you all know mr todd martens

but do you know why hes smiling?

cuz he beat the f outta cancer.

see that scar? todd was at the doctor and the doctor said:

all those years of basking in the right field bleachers of wrigley has gotten you skin cancer

todd said left field doc, left field. (right field sucks.)

then todd sucker punched his primary care physician, rifled through the cabinets until he found a scalpel. and




out of his 48 inch python.

totally not his pitching arm but that doesnt even matter either.

what matters is he took the cancer and showed it to his totally freaked out and cowering doctor sprawled on the floor and said is this it? IS THIS THE CANCER DOC?!!!!?!?!11?

he was all yes i guess yes!

and todd flicked it out the window

opened the door

paid the nurse his $25 co-pay

and sewed up his arm with a guitar string left handed

while reviewing the new frightened rabbits epic with his right.

because sometimes, friends, it aint no thing.

this sushi wasnt good

the service was fast, the price was ok. but everything we ate felt like it was left overs from thursday

and it was sunday.

heres why Foursquare is powerful – as bad as it was, the restaurant in question has no mayor.

which means if i simply go back for a drink then im its mayor.

but who wants to be mayor of somewhere pukey and terrible and dry and flavorless?

ive only been playing foursquare for a little over a month and im already mayor of 7 places, and i highly recommend them all:

+ El Gran Burrito (Los Angeles, CA)

+ Kanpai sushi (Los Angeles, CA)

+ KFC vine near sunset

+ Liliya China Bistro (Los Angeles, CA)

+ Mann Glendale Exchange 10 (Glendale, CA)

+ Origami Cafe (Los Angeles, CA)

+ Spitz – Little Tokyo (Los Angeles, CA)

saw Alice in Wonderland yesterday before the Oscars, and i liked it!