had a good day, which is rare lately

children of the future, the masked woman on the right is Cher

probably the first armenian american superstar. oscar and grammy winning fashionista.

she wants to save the post office.

we tried to volunteer this week.

they wouldnt let her.

so she went down to the post office with signs and started a little rally.

she wasnt thrilled with the turnout so she went on Twitter and said, lets do it again next week.

so i took this picture and i put it on the Los Angeleno twitter and this troll started trying to troll me.

but my middle name is howdareyou and i gave him the whats for. and because Cher was tagged on it she eventually saw it and made a little joke about one of my tweets and that pretty much made my day. my week even.

then amber came home with burritos. then we got the AC to work. then everyone took showers and then we watched a little of the Wire. and then we held hands in bed and said sweet things to each other.

and as i was saying sweet things to her she passed out.

but i kept saying things.

first i listed all the girls i had kissed in my apartment.

its been 20 years and i look like a runway model so you can only imagine how long that went on for.

then i said alexa turn off the lights

but i couldnt go to sleep. it was only 1am. last night i didnt get to sleep till 6.

so i went into the living room and played with the baseball cards.

played with the cats.

watched a guy catch baseballs at the all star game.

and thanked the Good Lord for my good life.

no ride is fun if its just straight and normal and without any thing to take yr breath away.

tomorrow i finish this thing ive been slaving over for a month.

sometimes it takes a while.

 

today did not suck

there are good people in the world.

i met a man whose wife is in charge of all the busses in LA

i told him i am busblog

i said i would love to interview yr wife if shes down

later he told me my car would cost thousands to fix.

i said look, if she doesnt want to be interviewed

just tell her those of us who ride the busses and subways

say thanks

we love it.

then i showed him my Obama tap card.

he had never seen it before.

i said that was a genius thing that came out of her department.

they should make more.

today is gonna be a tough day

bad tummyits 2:!4am

im listening to the police on shuffle

i just air fried some day old fries

thinking about the time i ate too much poutine at the canadian border mcdonalds

st catherines maybe?

wearing a cubs hat and a los angeles x games tshirt because im always a tourist.

that day turned out to be a bad day and my date and i nearly wound up in jail which is a great story id love to tell you but i digress

that day was bad but then it ended up good.

then the whole week ended up good.

it turned into one of the best road trips ever.

tomorrows gonna be bad.

so heres to the good that comes after.

dear tony, can you lose yr magic juice?

johnson

no.

anything magic is a gift from above that we have zero control over.

not that control is not an illusion

but we have less control over gifts.

sometimes you get a tie

sometimes you get a sweater

and sometimes you get the exact same thing youve always wanted.

more attention should be made about

how will i use this incredible tool i hope to one day have

and will it help the most amount of people?

instead of omg i want i want.

i have been in situations where i was waiting and waiting for the ball

and then i dropped it.

fortunately there were few spectators.

but still.

and others i got it

and not only did the right thing

but added a little soul.

those things all were boosted by magic from above

but i was even ready for that.

dear reader you will never lose your magic juice

but sometimes like in exodus theres gonna be feast

and theres gonna be famine.

its great to be prepared for both.

but today i heard there were blackouts all over town because of the heat.

so i say, hey baby, lets make sure we know where all the flashlights and candles are

she said i threw out all your candles.

and i looked around and

she wasnt lying.

sure glad we had that discussion tonight

and not in the middle of a blackout.

 

im writing about uber, something that should come easy

i did 5,000 rides over 6 years

it was the joy of my life for a little while.

i started this thing on Friday and here it is Monday night and i shoulda had it out sooner but i have something broken in me.

it’s why i think i need a break. a two week break.

its not that im lazy.

andy warhol used to tell lou reed all the time “write a song today. write two.” i can do this. i know i can. everythings a distraction. everythings bad.

the voices dont even know what to say. on this one theyre saying “this is wayyyy too long.” and “uber is gonna sue you!”

both of which are lame.

i cant concentrate.

maybe its the rona.

maybe its me.

but damn i could write about uber all day, who by the way, may be pulling out of CA this week which is why i want to write it before they do it.

then maybe i could do a follow up.

where would i even go on vacation?

heres what id do.

id unplug.

no social media.

barely any computer. only to write.

actually no computer. no writing. just reading and watching movies.

no tv.

no phone except to call my mom.

email, fine. but no facebook, no twitter, no IG, no snapchat, no tiktok no youtube.

woah, i love youtube. ok fine. youtube.

but since we cant travel anywhere,

being stranded with just movies and books and

maybe audiobooks

podcasts.

two weeks of this is what i need.

i wonder if i could arrange this at the beginning of september.

i need a vacation

thats what imma remember about 2020 the most.

there was nowhere to escape to.

for the longest i never understood the appeal of Palm Springs.

my mom got a time share there like 10 years ago and i was all whyyyyyyy

now i get it

it soothes the soul.

it recalibrates your time frame.

sometimes slow and low is the way to go.

but we cant go there even though theres a time share in the La Quinta Resort that i have fallen in love with.

fuckin Rona.

fuckin everything.

fuckin postmaster general taking sorting machines away and mail boxes away and mail away.

fuckin NCAA officials pulling their hair out because football cant exist in this

which means they cant profit from poor kids bashing their heads in.

thought i lost my computer this morning.

turned out it was in my underwear drawer.

i need a vacation like never before.

 

a lovely person asked me to remove her mentions from this blog

of course i obliged, who wouldn’t? and it was not the first time this has happened.

this old thing is nearly 20 years old. something i have a hard time believing myself.

and the things that you might agree to back in the day or the pictures you may have snapped and sent may not be the ones you want up forever and ever amen.

that does not surprise me.

what surprised me was how often i wrote about her or linked to her blog.

she was very good at blogging and was an inspiration to me, in part because she was just

so damn cool.

even in my greatest moments i havent been that cool.

when people are like that i want to study it.

i want to find the ingredients.

i want to bottle the seven herbs and spices.

are there times when i think i should just get rid of this thing, shut it down, close up shop, erase all of this from the sight of the sun?

yes.

but that’s exactly what the devil would want.

and this is and has always been my joyful noise to the Lord.

today was hard

didnt get a lot of sleep because i had a big meeting at 11:30am and i had been up until 5am putting together a box of baseball cards for this 10 year old kid who gives cards to other little kids

and i ask you, how do you not support that endeavor?

i buy super inexpensive cards buy the hundreds because currently there are a lot of people who are only interested in the most expensive cards and basically give away the rest of the set for pennies.

i have pennies. i will take the cards of the majority of the MLB off yr hands.

because of that i have boxes of doubles that may not be worth a lot on ebay today but you learn a lot from these cards. and one thing i have learned is its more fun to share than to horde.

so even though going to the post office is a chore and my tape never works and i struggle with addresses and the machines. today i went and learned some things and my favorite guy at the post office remembered me.

earlier in the day i had asked my mailman if any mail guy had ever been on a stamp. that stumped him. but when i asked my post office guy he said, yes in the mid 80s there was a generic stamp representing ALL postal workers.

i said, sounds like you people are overdue for a stamp.

when i got home i saw it wasnt the mid 80s when those stamps came out, it was the early 70s.

talk about over due.

back to my mailman. when i asked him why mailmen never get recognized he said there werent really any famous ones.

i asked, “maybe you gotta save an old lady one day”?

he said, “we save people all the time.”

and then told me that the postman is the first to notice when people dont get their mail.

walked to the store tonight because my car is broke

a couple things about my car. in april its paid off.

thats the good news.

the bad is it just went over 100k and it wont start.

the other good news is i have an excellent mechanic and when i called him he said

oh well you have two batteries. sounds like the little one is broke.

so tuesday we go get that fixed.

thus tonight amber and i walked to the store to get food.

you wouldnt think that two people who know they were gonna have to carry their food home would spend $75 when the mission was just to get some mexicokes and some ground turkey

but the salmon also looked good

as did the beyond burger meat

and the chocolate croissants

and the soup.

on the way there we ran past this homeless guy who i gave my winter coat to back when it was starting to get cold. and so we said hi as we went past and asked if he wanted anything from the store.

he said water.

afterwards he told amber he should have asked for baby wipes because he really wants a bath.

she talks to him all the time too, so they have their own relationship.

when we got home and she told me about the wipes i said,

there should be showers for the homeless.

why are we so weird about letting people take showers?

then it dawned on me. one of our neighbors JUST moved out.

and i have his key.

she said, he once told me he never wants to ever go inside an apartment

ever again.

i wonder what the story behind all of that is.