welcome fans of “what the heck.com”

y name is tony, and the auction that got you here is over a month old. but dont fret, you’re in luck. i have just posted a BRAND NEW auction, and I must say, i think it’s the best one yet.

so just click the ebay screen shot on the left and PREPARE for UTTER GROSSNESS. it’s sick, it’s not at all right. yes, i am auctioning off my recently pulled wisdom tooth!

regular readers to this page, please do not click this link unless you want to see a very personal side of me, the place where 1/4 of all my wisdom and humor and good looks came from. yes, my upper right molar. tooth #1 can be yours. there is no reserve.

once again, there is no reserve.

tomorrow i may or may not go into great detail about how there was very little anestesia and absolutely no nitrous oxide 🙁 and still i felt no pain. i wont tell you how they gave me some pain killers that killed the pain but didnt give me any of those dRuGGiE feelings that the kids yearn for so much 🙁 and i really wont tell you how here it is only 10:40pm and im going to get off the computer and lie down because im exhausted.

i miss wizzy, my wisdom tooth.

where ever you are wizzy, i love you.

im just over here on your shelf, remember?

oh yeah. god youre gross lookin.

zillions of people go the horrible movies every day

they dont listen to the critics. and kazillions of people read the internet, and online diaries, and live journals and blogs and web pages, and whatever you’d call my site and strangely there are people who are getting paid real money to criticize the Bloggers.

so if i were to comment, would i be criticizing the critics who criticize people who are simply writing about their lives for free in a public place? probably. but who cares, whatever. any one that i have ever heard of who has a problem with A.) bloggers for writing poorly (duh, mostly everyone writes poorly) b.) bloggers who scoop the “legitimate” press (duh, the press is white fat and lazy), or c.) bloggers who link their friends or stories they’ve read or sites they find interesting (duh, thats why Al Gore invented the mofo) can all kiss my pimply hairy black ass as im about to get my wisdom tooth jacked.

All the critics are doing by posing the theory that Bloggers are immature, amateurish, trendy, frivilous, and useless, are basically pasting a fat sticker across their own names with the word “irrelevant”. you may as well say that rock is dead. you may as well say that the world is flat. you may as well say that you are old and you need to be fired from your job because im sure that once upon a time someone said to someone else that there is this thing called the www and on it you could have your ideas spread across the planet and people will read it and interning in the basement of a thirdrate newspaper is a waste of time when you could be banging away at your pc and write the way you know you can write and people will hear the noise and you will be loved.

and our boys ken and matt and the others are proving it true that you do not have to have your name on newsprint to become a serious name to be respected. the same goes for the Instaman and all the rest. The young girls daily kick their asses at design but the rock is dead critics havent even made it over to that side of the flat earth obviously distracted by the me-so-horny pop-up sex ads that one might get from typing in “web girls” into Google.

and with that, since my dentist has given me a 10 minute break at his waiting room computer terminal — ahh, glorious Blogger — i will give some props over to my girl Sara who is going through some kitty difficulties, Kitty B. who has a nice picture of the hollywood foothills and tales of neighbors, the Rabbit who gives advice that most girls love to read – too bad its flawed but at least its funny and mostly true (do drink too much with the Friendlys and fuck some of them, or get fingered by one. a girl needs a little color in her cheeks for pete sake and not the kind from any Mac counter),

Novicane and Nitrous await.

me and karisa went to the laker game

tonight. i dont know what got slipped into our drinks but it kept things schmmoove. the seats were center court and up no one was in front of us for and long way and lots of leg room.

karisas cats are pretty damn close to dying. they wont say these things, but i will.the one cat was foaming at the mouth, the other wasnt eating or drinking,. so we didnt talk about it at the game, but we talked. i think i like talking with her the best of all the nice things that can be done at a laker game.

i was taught insights into dwarfism, giantism. we drank semi cold bottles of mgd and took the subway back and forth.

its karisas birthday next month, you think there would be a giftwish area somewhere on this site for her, but there isnt, ill get back to you when there is one.

things i learned today: theres stuff in the end of your joints that tells your body that its still time to grow. if its not there, its time to stop growing.; when jenna was on wicked and nikki was on vivid, the companies successfully break up thier friendship.

cubs won