jamie says that sometimes the comments are the best part

and of course he’s right.

#7 Jul 16 2003, 06:47 pm

Please don’t have children.


now its true i do take requests, and al3x was polite enough to say please, so i might have to give the man what he wants purely on principle.

not that it would be hard.

im not the most lovable man.

i sweat when i sleep.

i enjoy the bible.

and pornography.

i really know way too much about sports, and most women find that annoying.

and then theres this blog, and the website, and the busriding. those three things dont usually add up to a lot of fornication, i dont care how big your dick is.

i dont like to read very many books, i hate dancing, and i like to do it three times a day.

who’s gonna want that from their man, al3x?

im not handy, i dont like salads, im messy, i dont cook, id rather not go out on friday nights, im a terrible dresser, im not interested in money, i like hip hop metal and punk, and im always changing my mind.

girls dont like to lose at scrabble.

i fucking whip their asses at scrabble.

girls dont like being called girls.

girls dont like it when i call the united states america. they tell me that america includes north south and central america, not just the usa.

and then theres the problem about the fact that on the rare occasions that i do get a little action, i always wear condoms.


how am i gonna have any children doing that, my man?

so worry not, old chap, if your fear of a hundred little tonys running around this fine world in a few years has you losing sleep, rest your pretty little head.


your momma swallows everything i got.

jaime + oliver + reverse cowgirl

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