is there a new lost tomorrow?

hasnt it felt like 44 years since the last lost?

this weekend coming back from brunch we past this motel that was drying its sheets out in the air.

and i fucked up.

i told her, the only reason that i would marry paris hilton or her sister would be so we could try to buy up as many small motels that we could and make them supercool.

she was upset because apparently last week i told her that i probably am not a monogamous man. ive been successful at it, i allegedly said, but since i didnt think it was a natural activity, i was foolish to attempt it just because lots of other people went for it.

i was all baby, no ones saying theyre gonna marry paris hilton. shes got no titties.

which was another fuckup since babydoll runway model didnt have any titties either.

so as i attempted to hold her hand as i drove i told her that i had heard that motels spend an ungodly amount of money on laundry and water and soap

and i told her about the best western on the 5 outside bakersfield that had one little soap out in the room sink, but had big a soap/shampoo/conditioner dispenser in the shower

which i liked because it saved a lot of soap.


im not talking to you, she said.

so i turned on my sirius satelite radio to the maxim station and they were discussing the fact that 23% of married couples do not sleep in the same bed.

i held my hand up to her and i said

the only problem with that shower dispenser soap is it made my hands break out

and sometimes the faces these girls make

is awesome.

best + cds + of 2005

the day john lennon died in 1980 i cried.

not because i gave a shit about the pussy ass beatles, but because the cubs had traded away their star, reliever Bruce Sutter.

good ole number 42 had been a Cub since day one in in 1971 and broke in with the big club in 1976. however in ’77 he came into his own with his trademark split fingered fastball, the deadliest sinker ever in the sport and the numbers proved it – 107 1/3 innings, 1.34 ERA, 129 strikeouts, 31 saves, only 69 hits and a measly five homers allowed. and this for a .500 team.

sutter was a cub all star from 77-80, but when the Wrigley-owned Cubs didnt want to pay a relief pitcher $1 million they traded them to the dreaded St. Louis Cardinals for aging 3B Ken Reitz, young buck Leon “Bull” Durham and a player to be named later.

i cried that december day harder than any of the moptoppers because the winds of change were blowing and how did i know that big Lee Smith was working his way into the closer roll?

i liked bruce sutter because he was the everyman. it took him so long to make it up through the minors because his fastball wasnt very fast and his curveball didnt curve. so he tweaked the traditional forkball grip to make the splitter whose secret was right when the forkball was to be released the thumb pushed the ball through to add to the topspin.

the result was a pitch that looked like a weak fastball flying straight and true at the heart of the plate until the very last second when it fell off the table.

since Sutter’s fastball wasnt very fast, you never knew if the ball was going to keep going straight for a strike or die in the dirt.

the only time that i ever remember someone guessing right and beating sutter while he was a cub was Mike Schmidt in 1979 in the 10th inning of the 23-22 game.

once bruce was traded to the cardinals i watched him from afar and cursed the Cubs for not keeping him, but was happy for him when he won a world series ring.

so now the debate is whether Sutter will be inducted as a Cub (where he came up and had better seasons) or as a Cardinal (where he had a few good years but won it all). to me the choice couldnt be easier, he wasnt signed by the cardinals, he didnt learn his bread-and-butter pitch with the Cards, and the cards suck.

so a Cub he will go into the Hall as, im betting.

this was his 13th year of eligibility and the first true reliever to be elected – true meaning he never started a game.

so from all of us at the busblog, congrats Bruce!

and if you go in as a cardinal may you slip in the shower.

im + moving + to brazil

me and my buddy chris went to the laker game last night

kobe scored 45 but he did it so smoothly he made it look like 25.

chris has had season seats for the last five years so its nice to go to the game with him cuz he knows what the hell is going on.

i took the subway for the first time in a very long time. it was quick, easy, and cheap, just like me.

even the transfer at 7th street was sitting there waiting for us and pulled away just as we got there.

the laker girls looked good, the beers were $10, the hustlers sold $5 beanies, everything was perfect except for the fact that we have a rookie center who scored 6 points in 4 minutes but coach phil insisted on playing mihm and kwame instead.

coach phil’s team is on a three game winning streak and last night they did beat the eastern conference powerhouse indiana pacers.

reggie miller was at the game sitting about five seats away from coach phil.

lots of commercials at the game. hadnt really noticed that before. when theres a time out they play a few commercials on the big screen. during halftime they have some games for the fans to compete in but theyre sponsored by big companies whose names get shouted through the PA about every ten seconds.

but the worst commercial is from Chevron who has three little cars that race around the video screens circling the arena. depending on where youre sitting you either miss the first half of the race or the second half. the only good this race/commercial seems to be is to enable you and your buddy to bet on who will win and the loser has to pay for the next round of beers.

the ladies did come out, in droves, sporting miniskirts and kobe jerseys and looking la-liscious. you forget how many hotties there are in this town until you go to the beach, the laker game, or star shoes.

but in a city of eight million there are nine million hot babes which you forget about when youre driving through the woods of the pacific northwest.

i ate a hot dog for dinner and fell asleep watching keith oberman’s countdown.

im gonna die if i keep eating like this.

chishikilauren + ganem + artsysf + don and jen