around the horn

leah’s gonna get married in 5.5 months

shes registered at target, she rented a dvd for new years and now shes picking out flowers for her big bash

>Picking flowers. Who knew what a big rucus flowers could cause? We initially picked out flowers months ago deciding to get them out of the way. We were going with calla lilies and lots of greenary. How come everyone but us knew that calla lilies were the most expensive flowers in the universe? Anyways, so we changed everything. We are now going with amazing colors! (orange, pink, hot pink, red, and yellow) and I even get an arch. So excited about the arch. Gerber daisies, you are lovely!

>Met with the chef. Cheese, fruit, cake, and veggies. Eat before you come. I’m not your mother!

mimi’s getting married this weekend.

she may hurl.

OK. Now I’m nervous. So nervous that I can’t think very well. So nervous my throat is constricting and I keep having to pee. Tomorrow is rehearsal and blah blah and Saturday is it. Next time I post here I’ll have a new last name. And finally there will be no more wedding talk.

Wish me luck. I’m off to be a bride. Gulp.

bunny mcintosh has now been married twelve days.

this was her report from the silky deserts of las vegas

On Jan. 1, 2006, the resurrected bodies of my past life lovers George Washington and Benjamin Franklin ascended from Middle Earth to witness this, a most perfect union, between yours truly, Bunny Mcintosh and her dashing and wonderful husband, Richard Delicious.

I got married in a black dress. I won hundreds of dollars in slot machine play, and chased Weird Al Yankovic through a Caesars Palace shouting “Mr. Weird! I’m your third biggest fan. I have several of your tapes…” in a drunken bout of enthusiasm.

I will post pictures and tell you much more of my tale in a heart felt post in the not so distant future. Right now, I am decompressing by building a shed in the yard. In the mean time, be good my pretties.

we’re still awaiting that heartfelt post, however if you have anything you wanna ask the chickie from metric, mrs delicious will be happy to ask them for you.

ms jana pants finally made it to harvard and whats the first thing she does? dry hump the statue of the founder mr john harvard.

god bless our little angel.

does anyone read this piece of shit and live in boston, i don’t know anyone near my age and i want to go get wasted and do things that are not wholesome fun for the whole family. i lied, the only person i know here is a dude i was in future business assholes of america crap with in high school on the state leadership team and he is kind of boring and i don’t even think he drinks or whatever and we used to hook up Aaaaand he has a girlfriend. so it might be awkward.

come distract me so i don’t have to hang out with senator lameface. also i am going to nyc on saturday so if you want to buy me a drink please email.

alecia is the girl of my dreams. if only i was eighty years younger.

Over Winter Break I’ve:
-Gone to Mexico twice.
-Broken THREE fucking cellphones.
-Made out with a handful of guys.
-Made out with a couple lucky females.
-Smoked a lot of reefer.
-Taken a lot of adderall.
-Earned and promptly spent a shitload of money.
-Drank mind-blowing amounts of beer.

someone is clearly guest blogging over at chez flagrant:

– spent several hours researching at ucla.
– agreed to [guest lecture event] with the prosperous professor.
– sought out additional resume parchment paper in westwood.
– [worst part of day:] retrieved voicemail messages.
– agreed to go out this week with a make!up!artist! friend.
note: dread, i look ghastly, sick, rough, and worn, etc…

– shopped at whole foods.
– went to my house for the first time since last thursday.
– roasted a turkey breast for the physician who moved in with me.
he said: “i thought you never left the house?”

note: too many people continue to confuse today with yesterday.
consider: don’t they ever change their calendars?

and yes, i see shes dropped my link. no need to continue with the emails. the busblog hasnt been all that lately, who can blamer?

speaking of swimsuit models, why is it that when i see this, i like it just as much as this?

infact those curves simply make my mind want to snowboard all over them.

maybe it means im not gay after all.

take that shelbyville.

anti + featured fotos + freak power tix

sutter refuses to enter the hall as a cub

Tonee,

Sorry to be the one, but Sutter’s going in as a Cardinal. He says his family best remembers him throwing the last pitch of the ’82 World Series. I feel your pain.

The Cards did the same thing with Steve Carlton to the Phils in the early 70s because Augie Bush was as moronic as the Wrigley folks. Assholes.

Regards from your friend who has to confess to Cardinal fandom since age four (which makes me eighty four),

Mark Anderson

yes mark i had heard the terrible news.

someone in my comments notified me and because im not very level headed i called him names and dared him to prove it.

sadly i found the evidence before he did and i deleted my bitter comment of hate and ignorance.

this is a horrible act of disloyalty to the club that signed you, taught you the pitch, made you a star and loved you like one of their own.

he says his family remembers the world series the most

and thats why hes going in as a cardinal.

yeah sorry bruce, there havent been any cubs world series wins since 1908, dont take it personally.

and btw thanks for putting salt in the wounds of cub fans that the reason youre going in as a card is because of the world series.

whys it always gotta be about the world series.

i have a sneaking suspicion that the cardinals paid you to go in as a cardinal now that it looks like mark macguire will never get in, and its gonna be a long time till puljos is eligible.

i hate you bruce sutter, my former favorite player.

no i dont yes i do no i dont.

when i was in college i had a friend named gregory vaine who inspired me to do lots of things: record things on tape, write things down, take photos, and paint on found wood.

i am not a good painter in fact i cant paint at all.

and lord help a bad painter when he uses watercolors, not real paint, watercolors and paints that on wood.

but in those days i was doing a lot of drugs and i had patience back then that i dont have now and i blame the internet modem for that. ive noticed that i have the attention span and tolerance of the current modem speed.

back then i had the patience of a 14.4 dialup thru aol.

which meant i spent more time romancing the ladies, more time to read books, and more time to try to make watercolors work on dirty plywood

one summer in college i went home to illinois and i got a job as an ice cream man

i also had a summer girlfriend named tracey degrazia who i fell in love with and i would love to talk too again so if any of you know her she lived in park ridge

sigh

when the summer was over i had to fly back to santa barbara and we kept in touch and on my birthday that october she gave me a book called baseballs greatest pitchers, because she was perfect.

inside it had a page with a full-page black and white picture of bruce sutter, my hero.

so i found some wood and painted what i saw.

i started at the top of his head and because it was black and white at first i made it that but as i worked my way down i started painting in color, but when i got to his waist i got bored and instead of completing the cubs uniform, i gave him swim trunks where one leg had stripes and the other leg had polka dots.

and then i painted soothing colors all around him.

its my finest work of the three ive ever done.

im seriously considering selling that peice that has hung in my bedroom ever since ive lived here.

being that it pains me to look at it

knowing that he wants to be immortalized as a

a

i cant even say it.

first dave kingman going to great america on dave kingman day at wrigley, and now this.

et tu bruce?

that does it, im not going to the ceremony either.

JaG + dirty fez’s cool tat + panajane + jennifer