whats blogging life after Defamer? thankfully, it’s just as funny. hopefully not as stressful. but for readers, it’s just as delightful.
almost every day Mark Lisanti posts something short but interesting on his new blog Lisanti Quarterly. it’s on the Tumblr platform which is the short attention span format and the former defamer editor works it beautifully.
yesterday he posted this video of the Barack Roll if it were to have happened in minnesota last week.
if only the hacker kids werent slackers deep down. but i guess mccain entertained enough on his own. my only question is, what ever happened to the Ron Paul revolution that promised to make some noise at the con?
in her ongoing quest to dazzle the readers of the busblog, karisa j., seen here on sunset blvd right before she took over the lead in the 69th annual LA triathlon, IMed me on friday to tell me that she was going to participate.
the maps of the race were confusing, but if i wasnt hallucinating, it looked like the “Olympic bicycle turn” was mere feet away from my doorstep. a good thing because i didnt get to bed last night till 5am. cough cheerleaders.
in our IM on friday karisa told me that she was gonna jump in the pacific around 7am. so i asked, how long will it take you to swim, and ride your bike through venice, the westside, mid wilshire, and most of hollywood. she said, “just a few hours”. so i said, ok i will be on sunset near the scientology sign about 9ish. got there at 9:05 and was a little nervous that id missed her because there were a bunch of people on bikes (and a few people who seemed a tad out of shape). but lo, at 9:20ish, i heard this “hi tony” and there was karisa smiling and waving – which was amazing because most of the people tearing ass at that point were huffing and gasping and grabbing water from the volunteers.
but karisa was just tooling along, another walk in the park as it were.
i said, how ya feeling? she said good! so i took the camera out, hit the button and caught her coming around the turn-around. thats our girl waving at the :51 mark of the vid.
i was thinking about The Steps cuz they got that hockey mom on backup vocals, and you know, shes spunky. then i was thinking about Mingo Fishtrap cuz you can anagram their name into Farming His Pot. but after further consideration, im leaning toward Quiet Company cuz they rock.
Sharp: Do you ever get tired of us know-it-all Canadians who claim to know how to run the USA better than anybody in the USA?
canadians can speculate all they want. but theres one thing they have to do before they can say anything: allow beer sales in their grocery stores and gas stations. until booze is set free in the great white north, no cannuck can talk any trash on us.
Bob D: Answers to Abe questions Yes yes yes no no. Question…TP I am starting to get that all too familiar pain in the pit of my stomach as I hear of Zambrano’s tendinitis and Harden’s missed turns in the rotation, so my question to you is how many marshmellows do you think Rick Reuschel can fit in his mouth?
the correct answer is zero because The Whale doesn’t put marshmellows in his mouth, they go directly down his throat and into his gut. but thank you for the trick question. meanwhile, secure me a world series ticket cuz im coming out there in rocktober to get this damn thing done.
you cant fly to LA in a catholic girl skirt. for my birthday.
zona: Sharp. who DOESN’T? Yo Tone’, would you support a law prohibiting true blondes from shaving “down there”?
as a borderline libertarian i value individual freedom in ways that most people probably consider ridiculous. for example, i think a man should be able to paint his house any color he wants. with that said, the first time i ever encountered a true blonde i was 19, i think. these were in the days before people shaved. and when all was revealed in the backseat of my cadillac i swear it looked like a cloud floating above paradise. today it would look like – something totally different. although i would vote against such a law, if one was passed i would be interested to see how they would enforce such legistlation.
Andrea: What are your thoughts on girls in glasses?
girls look great in anything. ties, boots, scuba gear, top hats. when i used to work with karisa she would sometimes wear glasses and i told her that she looked better in them than without them. she didnt believe me. but twas true.
pure luck. the portion that i participated in, at least. by luck i mean, i am lucky to have a genius boss, im lucky to work around brilliant people, and im lucky that our bloggers are all pretty fantastic writers who work extremely hard. its a perfect storm of rock over there which is why readership is higher than ever in our history.
Phaedra: If you were to participate in a triathlon, which leg would you do – swimming, running, or cycling? And when are you coming back to Vancouver. I missed out last time apparently, or so I’ve been told
im a terrible swimmer, and i dont see the point of running. i would do the cycling part on my mountain bike and ollie over fire hydrants and potholes. im never going back to vancity.
Sharp (aka Azreal Darkskies): one more! What are your thoughts on bottled water?
when i was a kid i would drink water out of faucets, out of garden hoses, id roll up snowballs and eat that too. sometime around college i started hating water unless it was disguised as Budweiser. it wasnt until bottled water arrived that people, including myself, cut down on sodas and started drinking plain old water, which is better for us. yes they have to burn a lot of gas to deliver us the water, and they have to figure out what to do with the bottles once we toss them in the garbage. but i say lets burn all the gas so we can move on, and i believe that one day all those empties will fuel our homes. so thank you evian, arrowhead, et al.
David: do long distance relationships ever work tony? and will the rays stay on top or fizzle down the stretch? the bosox are only 2 and a half back…
ive never had a long distance relationship work out. maybe temporarily, but not in the long run. the Lord has made lots of people. make out with one who lives near you. american league is boring. theyre only competing to see who will lose to the cubbies, so i hope the white sox get it together so we can do it right.
Lewis: Has the experiment in democracy honored by the mf-er Lincoln lost all legitimacy and is it beyond repair? That is, r we tools to think digital tools, ie a digital commons, is strong enough to re-vive it, pleazzzeee, let’s not believe the hype, right?
no.
aj: tony – what’s up with the cubs?
the cubs are doing exactly what you should do when you’re playing pinball. you should push and pull the machine until it tilts. you should let a few balls bounce around the table and watch them drain. you should try to aim at every corner of the machine to see how everything works and reacts. the cubs are seein how every man performs in every situation. theyve even used zambrano as a pinch hitter. its ok that hes a little hurt. they all should be. but he will be back in time for the stretch run, and most importantly the playoffs. all will be well.bloopy: as much as i’d like obama to win, i can’t help but think mccain is gonna win purely ‘cuz he’s a white dude running for office in a relatively intolerant and ignorant country. . . plus i’m kind of concerned that with congress approval ratings being in the toilet, there might be a switch back to a republican majority with a republican president. . . got any thoughts to boost my confidence in obama’s ability to win the presidency?. . . or at least to boost my confidence that we won’t have another four years of an all-republican government?
obama has already presented himself to america. theres nothing more he can do to win. now america has to decide if they are ready for a charismatic educated black man. one day it will be. maybe that time is now, maybe it isnt. but this country isnt going to get a smarter brotha than barry, the question is, does that freak people out or inspire them?
i dont think congress will go back to the gop. of the two conventions, the dems had a more interesting presentation but more people watched mccain. but we’re still in iraq, our economy is still in turmoil, and gas still cost triple what it did not too long ago. i think most people think of Bush when they think about iraq and the fuel pump. and if they do, like-minded republicans will probbaly continue to be punished at the ballot box.
Phil: Tony if you had to sell your soul, what would you want for it?
if i *had* to sell my soul, i would want to be able to play guitar as well as hendrix. you can do a lot of good in the world with music.
would abe lincoln be more beloved if he had used a teleprompter? would abe lincoln vote for sarah palin? would abe lincoln hurt his rotator cuff during the last month of the regular season? would abe lincoln watch thursday night football will all his rowdy friends? would abe lincoln get swift boated for freeing the slaves?
shes always warm. so warm i havent used my heater in the 8 years that ive lived in hollywood. shes never cold unless i deserve it .
la is like 17 girlfriends all in one. drive from venice to south central to koreatown to east la and you’ll see some of it. truck up through the valley and westwood and little armenia and thai town and you’ll see that maybe its more like 42 girlfriends all in one.
the cars are great. the art is great. the food is beyond delicious. f paris. f italy. f vegas. theres so much music here that its not unusual for there to be Bob Dylan, Lee “Scratch” Perry, Three 6 Mafia, and Louden Wainright III all in different locales on a Wednesday night.
the houses are beautiful, the mountains are right there, the beach is right here, the desert is right over there. skateboards, snowboards, boogie boards, and surfboards fill each of our closets.
i also hear theres good shopping here. i know that theres Santee Alley and the venice board walk and their are outlet stores a short drive out of the county.
people talk about our schools being so so. i say YOUR schools are so so! the times just launched our huge Schools database which is more than so so.
but mostly i love LA for the people. i know thats weird to say cuz lots of people say that there are only shallow evil materialistic people out here. but the joke is, those are only the transplants from new york. i love all the transplants cuz theyre from everywhere. but i also love the natives. typically the most mellow people you’ll meet cuz theyve seen it all.
combined you get one of the best examples of melting pot anywhere in the world. which is why i celebrate LA’s 227th birthday… with the theme song of 227:
Yesterday, hardest hike and distance of my life: nine or so miles of the treacherous Kalalau trail along the Na’pali coast (google for more info–if you ever brave it, it it will be the hardest thing you ever do, I promise). On our way back after about 5.5 miles of single track seriously hard, muddy, move-2 inches-off-the-trail-and-you-plummet-to-a-horrible-horrible-death-among-the paradise-cliffs, N started running far ahead of me, leaving me panting and frustrated and slipping over muddy rocks and roots to catch up.
I finally caught up to chew him out along one of the switchbacks on the trail, overlooking the aquamarine jewel waters washing onto Hanakapiai beach. He was fiddling with his Camelbak and I was prepping myself to rip him a new one. He spun around and in his hands was a silver little box. Sweaty, muddy, and grinning nervously ear to ear, N knelt on a slippery, red rock, opened the box, and said, “So, you think this wait was worth it?” At that point I burst into tears and he had to hold me until I regained verbal capability. About three or four minutes later, N said, “I didn’t get your answer!” To which I hiccuped, “You didn’t ask the Question!”
He got on his knee again, and asked, “Will you marry me?”
two years ago this month i met the lovely maeko after reading her beautifully designed blog for a while, and not only was she a super hot tamale but she was really funny and very smart. we only had an hour to lunch because she had a crazy job, but it was really cool and she was one of the most interesting people i met on my trip around america.
and definitely the brightest moment in my little stop in the motor city.
“whats the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? lipstick.”
nice
update: Gloria Steinem writes an Op-Ed in the LAT and doesnt think Palin is the right woman for the job. Drudge links to it, comments flood our system.
apparently the band was denied access to the Ripple Effect stage (yes to Matisyahu, no Rage – that doesnt sound kosher), so they picked up a megaphone and the worlds greatest guitarist mouthed his famous riff and zach and the crowd sang Bulls on Parade:
Come wit it now! Come wit it now! The microphone explodes, shattering the molds Ya either drop tha hits like de la O or get tha f off tha commode Wit tha sure shot, sure ta make tha bodies drop Drop an don’t copy yo, don’t call this a co-opt Terror rains drenchin’, quenchin’ tha thirst of tha power dons That five sided fist-a-gon Tha rotten sore on tha face of mother earth gets bigger Tha triggers cold now empty ya purse
they rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells They rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells They rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells They rally round tha family! With a pocket full of shells
Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal I walk tha corner to tha rubble that used to be a library Linin’ to the mind cemetery now What we don’t know keeps tha contracts alive an movin’ They don’t gotta burn tha books they just remove ’em While arms warehouses fill as quick as tha cells Rally round tha family, pockets full of shells
todd has been a talented artist, cartoonist, harmonica player, and subtle comedian for as long as ive known him. he was my assistant arts editor at the daily nexus for a little while and then he became illustration editor and i got to work with the video guy.
what todd brought to the arts section and to the nexus was a truly creative mind that was rooted in possibilities. you only had to talk with him for a few minutes to have his mind juices start flowing. youd say, i want a Spike Lee thing, or i just wrote about this or that and how everythings Wack and todd would quietly get to work and have something great in a very short time. after a while i just said, todd every week i want you to have a huge image on the front cover and your drawings will be the center of arts week. of course i was fired before we could do too many of those covers but each one was terrific and weird and, now, collectors items.
todd has always been funny, always been amazingly talented, and has always drawn in a style that is equal parts tragic and dark and funny. usually all at the same time.
when i first moved to frisco after being transferred there by philips magnavox todd and i lived together in a pretty cool 2bdr apt on folsom near 23rd street. todd had a snake. somehow there was a hole in our apartment and mice made themsleves at home. for about two weeks that snake was fed lots of freshly trapped mice. meanwhile todd was (and maybe still is) a vegetarian. which was always interesting when he offered to cook dinner. believe it or not but for a long time i had never had a meal without some meat. todd taught me how silly that concept was.
for the longest mr francis has been designing skateboards and tshirts and graphics for element skateboards. the other day, fellow santa barbara mafioso joel brand posted a link to the video above on facebook and i couldnt stop laughing because todd hasnt changed one iota, not even in video. its beautiful. please enjoy.
