saddest craziest scariest illness of the day

MCA the deep voiced rapper of the Beastie Boys has cancer.

the Times’ Health and Science editor, Tami Dennis, wrote a really good indepth piece about this type of cancer in Booster Shots. an excerpt:

Now for some facts on salivary gland cancer:

* For starters, it’s rare, accounting for less than 1% of cancers in the United States.

* It’s most often found in people 55 and older (which is true for most cancers). Yauch is 44.

* Risk factors include smoking, prior radiation treatment and, occasionally, a family history. There are other, less proven connections, such as a poor diet and environmental exposures, but the data there are a bit thin.

Here’s an overview of salivary gland cancer, courtesy of the American Cancer Society.

The explanatory portion begins with this context:

Salivary gland cancer is a cancer that starts in one of the salivary glands. It is not a single disease. There are actually several different salivary glands found inside and near your mouth. Several types of cancer and benign (non-cancerous) tumors can develop in these glands.

even though i know everything will be fine, im still nervous. the only time i met the boys i insulted their choice of clothing – probably cuz i didnt know anyone was about to get cancer two years later.

the original version of the spike jonze classic (as it has the MTV-banned mannequin being thrown into the LA River scene)

the cubs magic number is 73.

just sayin

Steven Allen Adams: I turn 27 tomorrow: what should I do?

the gay dude in the new Real World (cancun) says that he doesnt celebrate birthday, he enjoys birthweek. so i say all week you party hearty which for me includes cake icecream video games good friends family and indulge in a really really good book.

g/d: Any theories,,,,? if the life roller coaster seems to be going down more then up.

isnt that the funny thing about roller coasters? typically when its going down thats the funnest part, whereas the creeping, creaking, upswing is usually the scariest part? i say enjoy the entire ride because just like at the amusement park – it’s over before you know it.

Sarah: I’ve never seen you through the roof angry. What makes you mad?

you have never seen me super angry because you are a very hard worker. laziness gets me pissed off, and pissing away great opportunities pisses me off. every day i pass this home depot and day and night there are guys leaning against the concrete fence waiting in the heat for any job to do any thing. i think about these guys all the time because i know of other people who dont fully appreciate the luck of the dice that helped them find themselves in their good positions in life. i also dont like it when hot babes cancel on me.

Ali M: In an episode of the Simpsons, Mr. Burns says to a class of 4th graders: “Family, Friends, Religion. These are the three demons you must slay to succeed in business” How true is that, seriously?

ah, a quote from one of my favorite Simpsons episodes. if you recall, this was the one where Mr. Burns begins the episode with that quote as he is addressing the Junior Achievers but midway through the show he finds out that his empire isn’t worth very much at all (due to poor stock choices by his Yes Men). Mr. Burns gets inspired by Lisa’s environmental passions – one that includes snipping six-pack plastic holders so that fish dont get trapped. Ever the entrepreneur, Mr. Burns fashions a huge net from recycled six pack plastic toppers and scoops of huge swaths of sea life and creates Lil Lisa Slurry from ground up sea creatures.

while its somewhat true that the Slurry would be a profitable business (according the the Simpsons Archive nerds, the Recycling Center that Burns sells earns him more than the nuke plant), it would have alienated Lisa from her family and friends, and GOD would have been pretty pissed at the wanton abuse of his beasts.

but it would have made them both some big paper which all the girlies love. so yes, as always Burns is right about business, but would you rather be filthy rich and alone for the exception of a closeted yes-man, or middle classed surrounded with good friends, family, and a possible place beyond the pearly gates?

jackassjimmy: If the girl whom you were close friends with for only one year of college, and then transferred out, hunts you down after 12 years, is that friendzone material or endzone material?

the concept of the Friend Zone is a cute one, but in theory makes no sense. what person would rather have a serious relationship with a stranger as opposed to a good friend who they trust and can communicate honestly with? why would someone basically punish someone else simply because they didnt bone after the first month of meeting each other? it’s my belief that one reason the divorce rate is over 50% is because of concepts likes the Friend Zone. so chuckle when she stiff arms you with the laughable idea, distract her, and plant one on her.

Mike: can you get me a jorb here in B.C.?

no but i can get you a rojb here in LA.

adrienne: what’s a good comeback for haters who anonymously leave comments?

wow, we’re coming up to the five year anniversary of the classic busblog post “How to Leave a Comment” which addresses the problem that some have with anonymous commentors. warning, it contains some adult language and i cant guarantee it will work for every blog, but you have to have the courage to stand up for what you believe in, or the ability to ban people who you dont wanna deal with.

katie: turtle without a shell: homeless or naked?

isnt it interesting that animals have no problems with being homeless or naked? and no that’s not one of my favorite pick up lines. yet.

zona: what bitchin’ hotel should I stay in when I get there? $75 tops

ahhhh, a trick question. for if i knew of a $75 hotel in LA that would mean that i am familiar with such establishments typically frequented by those employeed in the oldest profession. but if i dont know of any great deals then i lose my crown as King of Los Angeles.

with that said, i have never stayed at this motel, and i cannot validate its bitchin status, but it definately has a bitchin location. the Motel 6 right off Hollywood Blvd. in Hollywood very close to Hollywood and Highland has rooms right around $75 after tax.

Krista: What should a 23 year old crazy girl be doing with her life right now?

pretend that youre young in yr twenties, and then honor youth by raging free. also dont do anything that you cant do when you become less crazy in yr 30s.

Laura HK: Are you going to our 75th high school reunion this fall?

this is an excellent question and a tough choice because unlike most people, i actually liked high school. i was relatively popular, i got along with all of the cliques and ive sorta made something from my socalled life. however i did move away from our lovely hometown the day after hs graduation and ive never attended any of our reunions.

while it would be interesting to see what everyone else is up to, its pretty much culture shock any time i go back home to visit. i love the midwest and the suburbs of chicago, and im totally happy that i grew up there, but LA and Hollywood are really differnt and im afraid im pretty different than i was nearly 100 years ago. in some ways im the same, but my heart has always been interested in exploring the wild and unusual and im nervous that it would be hard to appreciate things the way they should be, which is why ive stayed far away cuz the last thing id wanna do is judge.