i will be drinking with the best auto critic ever tomorrow at 5pm

not only is Dan Neil a great writer, but so funny.

you know youre funny when you can make people laugh without saying a word:

dan’s even funny while peacing out

From: Neil, Dan
Sent: Thursday, February 11, 2010 2:54 PM
Subject: Dan Neil on the bounce

Friends, colleagues, brothers and sisters,

In the past week or so people have come up to me and said words to the effect: “The Journal, huh? Sinking ship and all that?” And I just want to slam their heads in a car door.

I absolutely love this newspaper and I am immensely proud of my association with it. People who talk {expletive} about the LA Times to me are going to find me in their grille in a major way.

Maybe you don’t know this story. In November 2002 I had just come through an awful divorce (we pronounce that DEE-vorce in North Carolina). I was sitting heartbroken and alone in a villa in the south of France, on some godforsaken travel assignment, contemplating the taste of gunpowder. Nobody knew where I was. The phone rang. It was former editor John Carroll, who had somehow tracked me down. He wanted me to come to Los Angeles and be the paper’s car critic.

Well, I said to him, as it happens my schedule has just opened up.

It was the beginning of the most wonderful professional experience of my life, the most fun, the most satisfying, the most intellectually challenging. This placed saved me. It made me.

It’s been a rough few years here, mainly because of the jackasses in Chicago who own us. To them I say, with as much gusto as I can muster in an email, {expletive} you.

On a happier note, there’s not a person in this building I do not like, if not love. The paper has more greatness ahead of it, and I’ll be watching from the east coast and rooting you on.

If you are able and inclined, there’s a beer call at Redwood tomorrow, around 5 pm. Hope to see you there.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Dan Neil
-30-

“-30” is an old school journalism mark that used to mean “end of story”. nowadays, sadly, in newsrooms around the country it means someone is retiring, taking a buyout, or being let go. it’s nice that in this case it simply means a pulitzer prize winner is being lured away by deeper pockets and a situation which would allow him to be on tv.

easily one of my favorite writers at the paper, his presence will be sorely missed.

i hope Tsar doesnt get in trouble for this

this is a live feed of the Hollywood sign, apparently being “hacked” by Tsar

who are celebrating the birthday of their bass player Jeff “Solly” Solomon

happy 24th birthday King of Judah!

update: the reason for the sign hijacking turned out not to be for the Tsar axewielder, but for some completely unTsar related cause all together.

plus it turns out that Solly is a Gemini, and isnt expecting a birthday till near summer.

photo by Eazylanish

i fall in love way too quickly

and for all the wrong reasons. but usually that love sticks around.

if you havent noticed im friends with almost all of my ex gfs.

indeed my valentines is an ex.

not sure what we’re going to do on sunday but it will be muy romantico.

why? why not.

im thinking about getting a motel in a bad part of town and getting a bunch of props and filling the room with the stuff including smoke machines and strobe lights and trippy music.

and flowers.

and filling the bathtub with jello.

which would take a long time, i know, but theres these dudes that stand outside the home depot and they swear they’ll do pretty much any task youve got for them.

yo i need you to make all this jello and then bring it to the no tell motel and fill a bathtub with the jello.

no problemo boss, they’ll say.

and there will be balloons and pizza.

all the things she never got when we were officially together.

candles…