that when people talk about the LA Bloggers they hardly ever mention your name?

me: some people do.

s: but not a lot of people.

m: not eveyone knows me.

s: yes they do.

m: says you.

s: your blog kicks ass

m: says you.

s: you dont think it does?

m: when people talk about LA Bloggers, theyre talking about war bloggers most of the time.

s: we’re at war?

m: i think so.

s: emmanuelle doesnt write about the war.

m: emmanuelle is a sexy cool french babe.

s: so?

m: so i think they think shes talking about the war, they just dont know french to see that shes not.

s: but i know how competitive you are, its gotta eat at you.

m: ben doesnt get written about and hes got two great blogs and he was friggin born and raised in LA.

s: but you even have a web site!

m: greg has a web site and he hardly ever gets talked about and he was born and raised in LA too, and he paints and writes rock operas. (and i think his wife is a. beam.)

s: are you kidding me? The Rallying Point gets linked all the damn time!

m: shh, no ones supposed to know that thats greg.

s: what? oh, whatever.

m: well, i appreciate your concern but it’s unneccessary. i have plenty of readers. and i dont write every day to get put on everyone’s left or right hand columns.

s: that’s a damn lie.

m: i write so that the hot chicks will fall for me.

s: yeah, hows that working for you?

m: the jury’s still out.

s: i got news for you, putting pictures of sassy tennis players and slutty singers isnt gonna make the ladies want you.

m: you never know.

s: i think that dentist extracted more than a tooth from your head. that auction by the way is completely gross.

m: why, thank you.

s: thats not a compliment.

m: sure it is, people love being grossed out.

s: but it’s such an easy trick.

m: not really, people see gross things all the time on the web, it’s almost impossible to shock an adult or gross them out nowadays.

s: “Friends” is still #1. the world is still mighty soft.

m: people watch “Friends” cuz they’re sick of being shocked all the time. they’re comfortable with the characters. it’s safe. nothing bad ever happens.

s: there’s never been “a very special ‘Friends'”?

m: i wouldnt know. i dont think ive seen more than 2-3 episodes.

s: you should watch it tonight, i think Joey gets a haircut tonight.

m: nah, im going to the LA Blogger thing tonight.

s: oh yeah, Virginia Postrel’s gonna be there.

m: yeah, im looking forward to meeting her.

s: did you read her thing the other day?

m: im ashamed to say, i dont think ive ever read her.

s: oh you should, shes brilliant. but married, sigh.

m: she writes above my head. i dont know nothin about what she talks about.

s: so why do you want to meet her then?

m: i like meeting people, and i wanna see if she’s nice.

s: was Instapundit nice?

m: that dude was super nice.

s: i see Prof. Volokh has a blog now.

m: yep. that guy was super nice too.

s: meet any Bloggers who werent nice?

m: hmmm let me think. i met one guy who sorta had a holier than thou attitude, but i just talked to everyone else instead.

s: who was he? i love juicy gossip!

m: to be honest, i dont even remember his name. im horrible at names. i checked out his site the next day, it was no big deal. he doesnt get mentioned anyhow.

s: what did he look like?

m: oh i remember him now.

s: who who! spill!

m: tony pierce.

s: you suck.

m: ha ha.

s: lets fight some crime.

m: ‘kay.

s: as in now.

m: but first i should thank JC for the buck.

s: hurry up, then.

m: ok, let’s rock.

i cant explain it. perhaps some if it is due to the meds the good doctor gave me, but i doubt it. i have a mighty high tolerance for pain and pain pills and neither gave me much of a buzz, although i did cop a little buzz from the thrill of having my tooth pulled with very little anestesia and two guys holding my head in place while a third smack-talked my molar, “oh, you gonna make this hard, huh?”

they gave me 800 mg of Motrin which I will probably give to my marathon runner friend cuz asprin is asprin i dont care how many MGs are in it.

i just feel good. i am a little jealous that the rest of the country is experiencing 90 degree weather and last night i had on the electric blanket since i am sleeping alone.

i am a little jealous that the rest of the world got to see “The Osbourne’s” last night since I forgot that it was on at 7:30 thanks to my Directv giving me the east coast MTV feed.

And I’m a tad jealous that Luis Gonzalez got $10,000 for his ABC gum (already been chewed) and I havent even gotten one sap to bid $5 for the most disgusting tooth ever.

But I feel good and not even a Sammy Hagar/David Lee Roth tour can bum my day.

My excuse? Well, when people link to me that always makes me happy. A Beam was the first to mention my auction, and even though I have a short list of possible suspects who might be Mr./Ms.Beam, I prefer mysteries and I would rather not know (although the mentions of Mickey Mantle and Ted Williams takes my prime suspect of Emmanuelle out of the running.) Then Ken rolled out of bed and uncorked a bottle of red and got some major traffic over here, gracias, amigo. I think your wife is A.Beam, btw.

Then Jim Treacher of Americas favorite new blog not only linked to me, but included a huge segment of something I wrote during my 15 minute break here at work yesterday (which has since been grammatically edited).

LA’s favorite koreatown dwelling young republican (he probably owns the block) Scott Rubush linked the auction, and that’s so cool you dont even know.

But the best was when Hall of Famer, Eddie Murray included me in his quotelog referencing a line from yesterday’s entry. I don’t know Ed, but I am always flattered when smart people who I havent met not only put me in their list of links, but to be in a quotelog is one of the coolest compliments a hack could get.

Still, those are not the reasons why I’m so happy today.

Infact, now I have forgotten the real reasons, but when I remember I will tell you, as I always do, as I should.

P.S. some kid sent me the new weezer cd (due in stores in May) in the mail saying that he was my number one fan and kid, i am your number one fan, that thing is great.

y name is tony, and the auction that got you here is over a month old. but dont fret, you’re in luck. i have just posted a BRAND NEW auction, and I must say, i think it’s the best one yet.

so just click the ebay screen shot on the left and PREPARE for UTTER GROSSNESS. it’s sick, it’s not at all right. yes, i am auctioning off my recently pulled wisdom tooth!

regular readers to this page, please do not click this link unless you want to see a very personal side of me, the place where 1/4 of all my wisdom and humor and good looks came from. yes, my upper right molar. tooth #1 can be yours. there is no reserve.

once again, there is no reserve.

tomorrow i may or may not go into great detail about how there was very little anestesia and absolutely no nitrous oxide 🙁 and still i felt no pain. i wont tell you how they gave me some pain killers that killed the pain but didnt give me any of those dRuGGiE feelings that the kids yearn for so much 🙁 and i really wont tell you how here it is only 10:40pm and im going to get off the computer and lie down because im exhausted.

i miss wizzy, my wisdom tooth.

where ever you are wizzy, i love you.

im just over here on your shelf, remember?

oh yeah. god youre gross lookin.

they dont listen to the critics. and kazillions of people read the internet, and online diaries, and live journals and blogs and web pages, and whatever you’d call my site and strangely there are people who are getting paid real money to criticize the Bloggers.

so if i were to comment, would i be criticizing the critics who criticize people who are simply writing about their lives for free in a public place? probably. but who cares, whatever. any one that i have ever heard of who has a problem with A.) bloggers for writing poorly (duh, mostly everyone writes poorly) b.) bloggers who scoop the “legitimate” press (duh, the press is white fat and lazy), or c.) bloggers who link their friends or stories they’ve read or sites they find interesting (duh, thats why Al Gore invented the mofo) can all kiss my pimply hairy black ass as im about to get my wisdom tooth jacked.

All the critics are doing by posing the theory that Bloggers are immature, amateurish, trendy, frivilous, and useless, are basically pasting a fat sticker across their own names with the word “irrelevant”. you may as well say that rock is dead. you may as well say that the world is flat. you may as well say that you are old and you need to be fired from your job because im sure that once upon a time someone said to someone else that there is this thing called the www and on it you could have your ideas spread across the planet and people will read it and interning in the basement of a thirdrate newspaper is a waste of time when you could be banging away at your pc and write the way you know you can write and people will hear the noise and you will be loved.

and our boys ken and matt and the others are proving it true that you do not have to have your name on newsprint to become a serious name to be respected. the same goes for the Instaman and all the rest. The young girls daily kick their asses at design but the rock is dead critics havent even made it over to that side of the flat earth obviously distracted by the me-so-horny pop-up sex ads that one might get from typing in “web girls” into Google.

and with that, since my dentist has given me a 10 minute break at his waiting room computer terminal — ahh, glorious Blogger — i will give some props over to my girl Sara who is going through some kitty difficulties, Kitty B. who has a nice picture of the hollywood foothills and tales of neighbors, the Rabbit who gives advice that most girls love to read – too bad its flawed but at least its funny and mostly true (do drink too much with the Friendlys and fuck some of them, or get fingered by one. a girl needs a little color in her cheeks for pete sake and not the kind from any Mac counter),

Novicane and Nitrous await.

tonight. i dont know what got slipped into our drinks but it kept things schmmoove. the seats were center court and up no one was in front of us for and long way and lots of leg room.

karisas cats are pretty damn close to dying. they wont say these things, but i will.the one cat was foaming at the mouth, the other wasnt eating or drinking,. so we didnt talk about it at the game, but we talked. i think i like talking with her the best of all the nice things that can be done at a laker game.

i was taught insights into dwarfism, giantism. we drank semi cold bottles of mgd and took the subway back and forth.

its karisas birthday next month, you think there would be a giftwish area somewhere on this site for her, but there isnt, ill get back to you when there is one.

things i learned today: theres stuff in the end of your joints that tells your body that its still time to grow. if its not there, its time to stop growing.; when jenna was on wicked and nikki was on vivid, the companies successfully break up thier friendship.

cubs won

so i will do my best to post something tonight and publish it before i leave to get my wisdom tooth extracted. perhaps i’ll even bring a camera.

yesterday i was driving Ashley home and we passed two Buffy landmarks, we found her home and her school. it would have been a little more exciting but to get to these important Torrance monuments we had to drive through the less-than-impressive city of Carson.

As we approached the famous Sunnydale High I came across a brilliant idea, that to sell my extracted wisdom tooth online!

this tooth has been in my body for nearly 108 years and if Luis Gonzalez can get several thousand dollars for his bubble gum, i should be able to get a pretty penny for my rotton molar.

all of this is in fun, but nothing is as fun, however, as my friend marc brown who compared my grade school picture today with that of a famous celebrity. enjoy!

this weekend i got to hang out with a cute gurl, i went food shopping twice this weekend. i guess i have a pretty good life.

God did i get a lot of email last week. some good questions. this one extremely perceptive reader (stalker) noticed that i count my blessings a lot and wondered if i was just rubbing it in. no, im just trying to feel good about myself, which is a constant battle, which is one very good arguement for people like me to hang out with cheerleaders.

when i was in junior high i was a superstar point guard for our school’s team and the cheerleaders had a great cheer for me each time i would score a point. they would sing, “Tony the Tiger says the mighty Chargers are grrrrrrrrrrrrreat!”

The older i got the less i heard that cheer, but it’s cool.

What’s also cool is watching Tiger Woods clean up at the Masters. Ashely doesnt seem to get the excitement, but Tiger has his his own cheerleaders. “You are so much cuter than him,” she’ll say as we watch. And I tell her that it’s not really a beauty contest but she sticks to her point and squeezes my hand.

Strawberries were on sale this weekend.

Polite review regarding the car that I rented these last days: The Nissan Altima was luxurious and pleasant.

“What do you say about a child like that? Do you congratulate him or something else?” Riverhills teacher June Young said after an 8 year old child drove himself to school and was immediately suspended, despite arriving to class on time.

The unidentified Floridian grade schooler jacked a 2002 Ford Focus from his Brentwood Place apartment complex in Temple Terrace about 7:30 a.m., Temple Terrace police said.

He then picked up a friend, drove 1.5 miles, crossing at least one busy intersection, and safely parked the brand new compact into the faculty lot at Riverhills Elementary School where he was spotted by students who eventually narced his ass out.

The boy said his uncle gave him driving lessons last week, police Capt. Tracy Mishler told the Tampa Bay Tribune. His uncle was arrested Tuesday and is in a Hillsborough County jail on unrelated charges of burglary, grand theft auto and possession of burglary tools.

Police said the boy didn’t know he was driving a stolen car and his mother didn’t know about the incident. And the teacher still doesn’t know if she should commend the boy, but the school does: they suspended him for ten days for putting himself and others in danger since he could barely see over the steering wheel.

Because no one saw the youngster driving the car, and there were no signs of neglect at home, neither the boy nor his mother was charged with a crime, Mishler said.

was in the 80s when she was married to fomer Plimsole, Peter Case. They both would end up with killer debut solo records on Geffen back then, and one of my friends was friends of theirs – Case actually produced their debut recrod – and i ended up at their house where a hootenanny broke out and i got to play the snare drum as they all sang 60s songs.

one of the best moments of my life.

later that week victoria took the tiny stage at McCabe’s guitar shop in santa monica with an old lady’s purse full of harmonicas, her friends were there, her dog was there, los lobos was there in the back row with me. these were the days of Lone Justice, the Rave Ups, and the Balancing Act – local LA bands that had what people might call a roots-music feel, a country twang, an Americana folky touch to them, but not the slightest bit hokey, where a harmonica and an acoustic guitar and a mandolin were always nearby.

decades before T-Bone Burnett won his grammy for “O Brother,” Victoria and the aforementioned were strumming their six strings.

Victoria sang all of her sweet little tunes that night at McCabes like “Shoes,” “Lights,” and “TC,” and as she has made it from one undeserving record label to the next she has left a trail of wonderful songs of love, friendship and Faith. shes a great song writer and singer and person and personality, and all her records are glorious little gems of joy, especially her newest one and even her live one.

you might have only heard about her when in ’92 she was diagnosed with MS and some big time musicians (Pearl Jam, Lucinda Williams, Maria McKee, Soul Asylum, the Jayhawks, Lou Reed) sang her songs on the first Sweet Relief album. the love cured her and she recovered quickly.

she even survived Microsoft using her version of Louis Armstrong’s “Wonderful World” when they wanted to launch Windows 95. her awkwardly beautiful voice is startlingly perfect for the song, most agree.

tonight she plays at the Derby here in LA.

i had a package from ups that they had left with her. my mom’s easter basket had finally arrived.

the neighbor likes to chit-chat with me whenever she sees me, which is ok, cuz she’s pretty good-looking, and i try to be a good neighbor.

“pardon me for asking, but i have the strangest feeling that i worked for your mother.” she said.

“i dont see how that’s possible.” i said.

“when i lived in illinois i worked for the loveliest woman who had photographs of her only son, and the boy looked just like that.” she said pointing at a picture of me on my mantle.

i kept quiet.

“Pierce Bros. Mortuary?” she prodded

“Pierce National Life,” i corrected.

“Oh, the woman I worked for was at Pierce Bros. Mortuary.”

i couldnt tell her about the mortuary because sometimes we use it for the xbi, the only reason, i fear in my darker moments, that i was asked to join up.

“why is it that you rarely use your parking space?” she continued. “pardon me for asking, but it’s right next to my deck.”

my phone rings all day. why couldnt it ring then?

“DUI.”

“but sometimes i see you drive rental cars?”

“rentacar places dont look at your driving record.” i said.

“i never knew that.”

“glad i could teach you something.” i said.

she invited herself in, i was boiling water for my potatoes. later she asked more questions.

“so are you the only heir to the Pierce National Life fortune?” she asked.

“the money will probably go to my sisters. i like to make my own way.”

“are you making twice baked pork chops?”

“why, yes,” i said.

and then she taught me the secret to making twice baked pork chops.

the secret is lust.