her english isnt so good

but mines not all that neither.

at first she was shy but when she saw i wasnt gonna judge her for wanting to fuck 5-6 times a day she opened up.

i think shes italian im not sure maybe from peru.

her favorite phrases in her cute accent are


and i love you.

i tell her just speak your language, your language. shes drunk and spent and sprawled out over the polar bear rug (faux) (im so sure) with just her short shorts on playing with his ears. fake brushing his teeth. blah blah blah she says and soon i see shes crying. sobbing really. but tears coming down, mascara dripping, snot getting sucked back up.

continue-aye i say and toss her the roll of paper towels and im listening but with my heart. get it out baby. i hold her hand and she just cries and cries coughing out the words in that gorgeous tounge.

we all have sad stories i whisper, not hushing her not saying its gonna be ok cuz i only lie in the blog and in real life everything just might not end up ok. so cry pretty girl and drink some of this.

she goes on for so long that i forget that im in a fantasy nba league and i miss the live draft. now theres two of us crying.

the doorbell rings and its pink dot with vodka and rocky road cuz im starting to think shes russian. the american girls have told me in so many words that im not their type and thats cool with me. im not my type neither.

and for a town that was 86 degrees on friday night it feels like 16 degrees tonight so i light the fire

bring out the blankets and see what the computer picked for me besides elton brand.

and then we hold each other and cry some more

happy that jose lima is alive and well

and has finally broken out of his shell.

but not sure we’re gonna be awake for snl to bore us to sleep.

The Second Busblog NBA Fantasy Hoops League will draft on 10/30

League ID#: 62736

League Name: busblog2

Password: bloggy

Draft Type: Live Draft

Draft Time: Sat Oct 30 12:30pm PDT

raptor blog + katzinjammer + bunny and her sister go to the fair

she came over and got ready

and changed the sheets to clean ones and filled the sink with rose petals and girlie scents spinkled the hallway with moonshadows and lipstick traces. had lasagne baking in a stove unused since years back when jeanine and chris made redneck maccaroni with velveta and trader joes wheat noodles.

i got home late and my mohito was melted the candles had shrunk and the dinner had hardened. she didnt care. her legs were crossed and her top boot kicked and she ignored my entrance and listened as i stopped in the hall and noticed in shocked suprise the changes in the hall way and bed room and bath and kitchen.

she heard my hard shoes scuff across the floorboards and muffle along the carpet of the front room and there she was dressed in chainmail and leatherstraps hair spiked makeup darkening her already sharp features

fresh rips in her fishnets ghetto designs on her fingernails belly chain and fake tatto, is that a nipple pierce, that’ll do.

had figured out my home theatre the last time she was over and was watching The Factor suprisingly, she held out her gloved hand to be kissed which i did and she smiled without moving her attention away from the television.

“i want everyone at home to answer this question. im at home and im osama, cable tv coming in, fox news channel, alright, i know he loves the factor. you got cheney and you got edwards sitting at the table, who are you more afraid of?” juan williams wouldnt answer because he’s a pussy ass bitch and afraid that the obvious answer is cheney but hes been faked out by that brainiac o’reilly.

i took the remote from the pretty girls lap.

turned it off.

and i said, the correct answer is edwards

because bush cheney is way more interested in iraq than osama which is why theres ten times more troops in iraq than afghanistan and…

she put her finger over her mouth clicked over to the oven

pulled out our dinner as i opened the wine

as air’s talkie walkie began to play through the itunes

which happens every other blue moon

and nobody cared about the blah blah blah

and its saturday and its three pm and she left me with a smile

and some might be lucky, but not more than me by a mile or three.

the ward turns three + private jet isnt enough for ucsb‘s sean hannity + sk smith on fire

it’s saturday so who cares

the have you lived quiz.

things ive done in bold

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink

02. Swam with wild dolphins

03. Climbed a mountain

04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive

05. Been inside the Great Pyramid

06. Held a tarantula.

07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone

08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it

09. Hugged a tree

10. Done a striptease

11. Bungee jumped

12. Visited Paris

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea

14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise

15. Seen the Northern Lights

16. Gone to a huge sports game

17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa

18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables

19. Touched an iceberg

20. Slept under the stars

21. Changed a baby’s diaper

22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon

23. Watched a meteor shower

24. Gotten drunk on champagne

25. Given more than you can afford to charity

26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope

27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment

28. Had a food fight

29. Bet on a winning horse (even if it was only $1)

30. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill

31. Asked out a stranger

32. Had a snowball fight

33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier

34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can

35. Held a lamb

36. Enacted a favorite fantasy

37. Taken a midnight skinny dip

38. Taken an ice cold bath

39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar.

40. Seen a total eclipse. (Through one of those fourth grade cardboard “save your eyes” thingies…)

41. Ridden a roller coaster

42. Hit a home run

43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days

44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking

45. Adopted an accent for an entire day

46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors

47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment

48. Had two hard drives for your computer

49. Visited all 50 states

50. Loved your job for all accounts

51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced

52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied (maybe now?)

53. Had amazing friends

54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country

55. Watched wild whales

56. Stolen a sign

57. Backpacked in Europe

58. Taken a road-trip

59. Rock climbing

60. Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice

61. Midnight walk on the beach

62. Sky diving

63. Visited Ireland

64. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love

65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them

66. Visited Japan

67. Benchpressed your own weight

68. Milked a cow

69. Alphabetized your records (and CD’s and tapes and and and…)

70. Pretended to be a superhero

71. Sung karaoke

72. Lounged around in bed all day

73. Posed nude in front of strangers

74. Scuba diving

75. Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye

76. Kissed in the rain

77. Played in the mud

78. Played in the rain

79. Gone to a drive-in theater

80. Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it.

81. Visited the Great Wall of China

82. Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog

83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better

84. Started a business

85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken

86. Toured ancient sites

87. Taken a martial arts class

88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman

89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight

90. Gotten married

91. Been in a movie

92. Crashed a party

93. Loved someone you shouldn’t have

94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy

95. Gotten divorced

96. Had sex at the office

97. Gone without food for 5 days

98. Made cookies from scratch

99. Won first prize in a costume contest

100. Ridden a gondola in Venice

101. Gotten a tattoo

102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on

103. Rafted the Snake River

104. Been on television news programs as an “expert”

105. Got flowers for no reason

106. Masturbated in a public place

107. Got so drunk you don’t remember anything

108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug

109. Performed on stage

110. Been to Las Vegas

111. Recorded music

112. Eaten shark

113. Had a one-night stand

114. Gone to Thailand

115. Seen Siouxsie live

116. Bought a house

117. Been in a combat zone

118. Buried one/both of your parents

119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off

120. Been on a cruise ship

121. Spoken more than one language fluently

122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone

123. Bounced a check (I didn’t mean to! But alas, more than once…)

124. Performed in Rocky Horror

125. Read – and understood – your credit report

126. Raised children

127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy

128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour

129. Created and named your own constellation of stars

130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country

131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did

132. Called or written your Congress person

133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over to be with the one you love

134. …more than once? – More than thrice?

135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge

136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking

137. Had an abortion or your female partner did

138. Had plastic surgery

139. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived.

140. Wrote articles for a large publication

141. Lost over 100 pounds

142. Held someone while they were having a flashback

143. Piloted an airplane

144. Petted a stingray

145. Broken someone’s heart

146. Helped an animal give birth

147. Been fired or laid off from a job

148. Won money on a T.V. game show

149. Broken a bone

150. Killed a human being

151. Gone on an African photo safari

152. Ridden a motorcycle

153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph

154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced

155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol

156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild

157. Ridden a horse

158. Had major surgery

159. Had sex on a moving train

160. Had a snake as a pet

161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon

162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing

163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours

164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states

165. Visited all 7 continents

166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days

167. Eaten kangaroo meat

168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground

169. Been a sperm or egg donor

170. Eaten sushi

171. Had your picture in the newspaper

172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime.

173. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about

174. Gotten someone fired for their actions

175. Gone back to school

176. Parasailed

177. Changed your name

178. Petted a cockroach

179. Eaten fried green tomatoes

180. Read The Iliad

181. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read.

182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them

183. …and gotten 86’ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you

184. Taught yourself an art from scratch

185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating

186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt

187. Skipped all your school reunions

188. Had sex with someone half your age or twice your age.

189. Been elected to public office

190. Written your own computer language

191. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream

192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care

193. Built your own PC from parts

194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you

195. Had a booth at a street fair

196. Dyed your hair

197. Been a DJ

198. Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal

199. Written your own role playing game

200. Been arrested

no matt + mass live + great pics of chicago