cuz im fancy sometimes

so fancy i took off my dodger cap that i just bought at the gas station.

im not a huge fan of the dodgers, but theyre the local team,

and i love these hats that are in the colors of their biggest rivals.

like they have these green and yellow Giants caps

or the blue and white Angels caps.

this was a black and white Dodgers cap. subtle, but definately

a tip of the cap

to the dreaded new york baseball yankees.

so i took off my hat and placed it upside down at my feet and dug into the menu.

my accomplice saw that in this fancy steakhouse was written these words in the menu

“Lettuce Wedge – Classic and simple. If you feel like tossing your own salad! LOL. $7”

it was so hilarious on so many levels that i totally forgot my cap as we exited.

so yes, for those of you who arent familiar, beverly hills knows how to party.

that im not feeling this new LCD song or video?

plus its a Spike Jonze joint, but it seems like his whole idea was “lets see if we can make a video in 20 minutes with zero budget and zero ideas…. and ROLL EM!”

Spike seems uninspired and LCD sounds like they listened to the Velvet’s “white light / white heat” and forgot its called A RIP OFF when you “write” a song like “drunk girls”

i mean, am i crazy?

as instructed by musicians

this has to be the oddest story ive heard coming out of this years coachella

according to Todd Martens and documented by these photos, the kids at coachella this weekend listened to a band leader id never heard of, and set fire to their own cold hard cash.

Nothing goes better with hot desert temperatures, a tired and possibly drunk or stoned crowd, than fire, right? Funk-soul revivalist King Khan instructed fans to pull out dollar bills, and then set them aflame. Ask, and you shall receive, and about two dozen fans in a cramped tent started raving flaming dollar bills, dropping them on the dry grass when the heat became too hot to handle. – Pop & Hiss

i guess if you just laid out $300 for tickets, a several hundred for lodging, and various amounts for travel and food, whats a few bucks aflame because KING KHAN TELLS YOU TO.

its not like you can buy anything there for a buck anyways.

photo of an unrelated burnt bull by see-ming lee via flickr

or somewhere crazy like that.

and blogging beautifully:

pictured here: $4 fifth of vodka. mix it up with a $.90 1.5 liter of sprite and a $.25 bag of ice and you’ve got yourself the cheapest party around. compare that to $1 beers…when you’re drinking like we do, that’s some serious savings. you can buy cups for $.30, but what are we? made of money?! bahts don’t grow on trees, you know!

she goes on to explain that they cut plastic bottles in half and drink out of them.

bookmark her blog and read all of her adventures which pretty much just started

everything.

its why i beg yr forgiveness for being impatient.

its why i dont have time for apostrophes

its why i dont care that they stole my bike.

its why i dont care whats in the driveway.

its why i kissed yr best friend.

again.

as you know, each Sunday i read from the bible for an hour.

today im rounding the corner on second Kings where we read a diss so juicy and delectable that one doesnt even need a set up as to who said it or why. it’s just another in the many beautiful lines of the bible.

Behold, you are trusting in Egypt, that broken reed of a staff, which will pierce the hand of any man who leans on it. Such is Pharaoh king of Egypt to all who trust in him.

thats 2 Kings, 18:21, if youre reading at home. english standard version.

but i bet you half of these guys are now with incredible babes.

how do i know?

are you telling me you dont know dudes exactly like these with amazing women?

so whats their secret? theyre obviously douchetastic. of course. but they dont care. maybe they care a little, but why let that stop you.

the way they break through their inner douche is they simply break through. here you see them asking for what they want. later they will do so in public.

of course they will get rejected. but it only takes one to say yes.

i see so many blogs written by both men and women, incredible folk, who yearn all for the same thing: love.

but they dont do what these dbags do – get out there in a nearly embarrassing way. just like a bird. cawing to the sky “here i am, here i am”.

and before they know it, theres another lil bird sitting on a branch near them. and they fly over. fly away.

together.

pooping on the heads of those below.

ask for the things you want in your life. and keep asking. and dont stop.

to see the nazi-like banner behind bad religion last night at the house of blues

id seen a smaller banner atop the sunset strip club last week and i thought it was more funny than ominous, but a huge one like that with the band playing and the shirtless sweaty tattooed skinheads running around made it a bit more of a shock.

and dangerous.

which was awesome.

as a born again Christian you might wonder what i was doing at a Bad Religion show, but the truth of the matter is i love them, theyre one of my favorite bands, and what you should be more surprised about is that this was the first time id ever seen them.

what i like about them is their poppiness. biting lyrics, driving rhythms, and short blasting guitar solos that most punk acts cant deliver. plus most of their songs have no real attacks against Faith – or at least no more than any other mostly-cynical group.

in person theyre the least likely rock band. in any other situation youd think these average joes were more likely to play Rock Band on wii, not celebrate their 30th year run.

after a couple of beers karisa wanted to get in the pit.

every pit has its ups and downs. its nice to rub shoulders with humanity sometimes.

its also nice to experience todays youth at their most, uh, ripe.

sweat and beer and a few toxins being released in a punk pit can smell unique to say the least. and at times the pit expanded and contracted so quickly that you couldnt fight the tide.

gas can be known to escape. and at one point someone released something so exotic that karisa yelled WHO FARTED and several shirtless offenders blushed.

after they played their 30 song set, i peed in the mens room and a guy with a bloody foot said “that is the best tshirt of the night.”

referring of course to my bootleg Taylor Swift concert tee i bought outside staples on Thursday. the same one that karisa gave me a hard time about all night.

my neice and nephew send me photos all the time.

then they complain that i dont post them up here.

last night took the truest to see Exit through the Gift Shop. great great great.

this afternoon we snuck out to Kick Ass, which i liked but they gave away sooo much in the previews. why must people insist on doing that?

anyways now i wanna interview shepard fairey and ask him a bunch of stuff about art and punk and warhol as it relates to banksy and mr brainwash.

think he’ll have a sit down with me?

anyways we saw Kick Ass at the Grove and we saw this amazing scene – this heavy set family were loading in their shopping bags into their Hummer at the valet stand. what were they loading in? bags and bags of American Doll stuff.

tonight is bad religion.

i think someone stole my bike!