ive been known to be a jerk at times


when i was in college i was overly blessed. i was on the radio every week, wrote in the paper every day, i got to read and write around all these  smart kids in the college of creative studies where you were rewarded for being creative instead of punished.

and i worked all these crazy jobs.

the best was being an editor at the daily nexus. to my great lucky they let me write for all the desks including being allowed to write numerous opinion columns.

back then on campus everyone read the paper. not only were we award winning but it was very funny and in the opinion pages no topic was taboo.

apparently one of them made their way to the real paper, the santa barbara news press and when they were looking for someone to write a column in their “Student Voice” deal, i got a phone call (there was no email back then).

they were gonna pay me $50 to write a column, but it had to be specific to the campus. that was easy, our campus government approved an expensive recreation center that they barely vetted. in hindsight we were right, but that thing is pretty damn cool.

the problem was, i didnt like the news press. mostly because they didnt hire any of us after we graduated. they had one guy and that was it. meanwhile we were extremely good, winning state, beating all the big schools usc, ucla, berkeley, the daily nexus should have been a pipeline to that paper.

so after i turned in my piece i got a phone call, they wanted to know a few things about me for the front page. anything look odd?

honor roll? me? excuse me as i die laughing.

also, it showed how little the news press knew about ucsb, creative studies doesnt have grades, how would i have a 3.9 gpa?

also, isnt that something you should be fact checking, particularly on something youre putting on your front page, in color (which was expensive back then)?

regardless it was dickish, i shouldta done it. not that anyone would have noticed. but it fed into my belief that that paper needed more nexus ppl over there

because where do you think i learned

fact check every damn thing

my rim is busted so i couldnt drive

went to american tire on hollywood blvd across from jumbos and they are so good

guy even remembered me somehow even though that place does soooo much business

they may repair it, they may get me a used one, worst case they sell me a new one

its murphys law for bad luck because neither lyft, uber, patreon, or my writing gig have paid me

all if it should have come through by now but nope

im running on fumes.

i say this not to whine or bitch or cry or look for pity

i say it because if i ever go back to this date i want future me to know when i went to the grocery store today i paid in cash with a $20 in my pocket

why was it in my pocket?

because i went to 7-11 in los feliz to get money out of my savings from my credit union

so i could drive to the chase bank down vermont to deposit the cash into my main checking account

and the atm wouldnt take two of my $20s

but vons did. so they’re ok? it was scary,

being broke is so silly at my age. like how did i get here. and how will i get out.

that, friends, will be the interesting journey of 2024.

will it be from writing writing writing?

will it be a combo of writing and driving and podcasting and having zero social life

will i get a ‘real job’ – which weirdly are paying six figures to start nowadays, a salary i could seriously use

or will some miracle happen like someone wants to give me a book deal / advance to write my uber stories

or someone will wanna be the sponsor of the podcast

or someone will just wanna be my sugar momma and all ive gotta do is some filthy ass ish in her hollywood hills bachelorette pad

at this stage of my life, im down.

ive got art to make.