dear gay, bi, lesbian, and transgendered readers of the busblog

hello, my name is tony, i write little jokes.

i have no hatred for any of you, infact i love you all. not because im enlightened or open-minded, but because im lazy, and its easier for me to accept foreign behavoirs than it is for me to hate them.

i lived in san francisco for many years. now i live in hollywood. hard to throw a rotten egg out a window without hitting a gay in either of those towns.

i also wrote for a college newspaper where the boys liked to kiss one another to freak everyone out. only defense for such an action was to kiss them back with more tounge. strangely, the womenfolk were amused by this behavoir, and maybe a little turned on. also amused (but not turned on) was the California Intercollegiate Press Association who hosted the college journalism awards that we won annually, in dresses.

with that said, it’s safe to say that im not a homophobe.

additionally, it is my belief that people should find love wherever possible.

me, i love to write. i love to experiment with language. i love to play around with ideas and concepts and slang, and hot buttons.

in 2003 you wont see an LA Times columnist say that something is “gay.” Even if something is blatantly gay, you wont read a writer write it.

i think thats fucked up.

similarilly you wont see a writer say that somethings fucked up.

theres a problem there. we have a problem with language and communication. we are so politically correct these days we’ve painted ourselves into a corner where everyone is a victim to anything that comes out of anyone else’s mouth.

when i see things that are fucked up or gay and i dont write it down and present it to you, im not doing my job as a popular blogger.

now, for all the racist, sexist, homophobe motherfuckers out there: hi, my name is tony. please stop being ignorant.

please stop being violent to people different than you.

please stop acting in such a way that people wont let me say that something is gay when i want to say something is gay.

cuz its all gay.

weisblogg + totally awesome

all this politically correct bullshit, is so gay

and it’s so nineties.

tonight the lakers are playing. a super hot chick is coming over to eat thai food with me and watch it with me.

this morning an electrician came over to “test” the new electric box they installed the other day.

who the fuck checks shit like that at 8am?

so gay.

what if i was sleeping? what if i was writing? what if i was taking care of business in some way?

what if i was making coffee for the second hottest chick i ever met and i dont even know how to make coffee but im trying to impress her scandinavian bruised ass?

dude knocked on my door and asked me to turn on the porch light so he could see if he was switching off my lights, so he could mark it on the box.

i said fine and laughed.

chick told me that i laugh at everything. that everything is a joke to me. she said i reminded her of the black cosby-ish doctor on the simpsons.

i told her that my coworker said that i was not enough of a disgruntled employee at work.

i told her that he called me far too gruntled, as a matter of fact.

then my porch light when out and i yelled at the dude and he said thanks.

then the toast popped up and she drove me to work.

we got caught in traffic and some asshole started honking at the traffic.

totally gay.

i heart kate + true boy rocks + happy birthday katie’s boyfriend

today is the last day

of the i will link you on my blog auction.

the winner will have his or her blog or web site linked in the upper left where you see “no creativity”‘s link for the entire month of may.

if the winner does not have a blog or web site, and would like me to link something else, i will be happy to do so.

i dont care what it is.

how bad could it be?

if it was really terrible would it be a bad reflection on me? of course not.

similarilly, if it was a super cool blog or website, then people shouldnt look at me in a more positive light. but if you must…

as i lay my head down to sleep tonight, i see the bidding has reached $36. let me say that im impressed.

thats a little more than a twelve pack of mgd, i dont care how bad your local liquor store is ripping you off.

$36 is mighty close, however to the cost of an LA Metro bus pass, which is funny, because i have kicked around the idea of scanning my bus pass at the begining of the month and if anyone wanted to flow the $42, that they’d be linked for a month underneath the picture of the bus pass.

am i making any sense?

its nearly one am. my phone has been ringing off the hook. ive been watching my new favorite show on tivo, mr. personality.

this guy got lewinskied in the mens room by a hula girl and the next day monica herself wanted to judge him for the sole act that she is infamous for.

but oh to only be judged on personality and the opportunity to make a move in a dark basement with a hot bikini girl.

how far would you go?

of course you kiss her, duh, but what do you whisper afterwards.

id whisper, squeeze my arm if you want more

dirty girl


best thing about these shows is its a bright light on the sad fact that there are very few good guys out there, which makes balding busriding ebayers like me a little more comfortable in our mediocraty.

i read a lot of good blogs today, and one spoke of the possibility of throwing a makeout party, and i say throw it.

if only to give some budding romeo the chance to introduce himself to three blushing girls next to the record player so he can say and i will before the night ends make out with you and you and you

so get ready.

your favorite sorority girl + best redesign + not a slut + full of nothing + nobody