pablo picasso was never called an asshole.

but i bet he was called lots of other names.




with initials like mine, you can imagine the nicknames i was called.

tp never bothered me much.

when they would just straight up calling me Toilet Paper, well that was interesting.

but being the only black kid in school for most of my life, the n word was tossed around from time to time.

strangely that never bothered me much either.

names dont bother me. words dont bother me. very little bothers me.

the cubs and their mediocrity bothers me.

people who believe a president who has obvious personal agendas sorta bother me, but not much.

people who stand next to each other in escalators annoy me way more than pretty much anything nowadays.

if you really want to get me in a pissy mood, clog the escalator in the morning and look at the ceiling. maybe turn around and say “cubs suck.”

in other news i went bowling last night and flirted with some lesbians.

only bowled a 137.

i was only sorta drunk.

afterwards i slurred loveable words to my truest and she giggled. i told her that no offense to anyone else but i have yet to feel a connection to another person like what i feel with her.

she said she felt the same thing.

i said lets go to britneys chapel in vegas and get hitched.

she said what about the paparazzi.

i sad f the poppies.

she said what about the maloof brothers.

i said f them too.

she said what about the fact i dont feel that way about you any more.

i said, hmmm.

then she told me she had quit smoking thanks to an out of date book that karisa got her.

and i fell for her even deeper.

malatemail + janelle + true

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