first one says i want to make a blog called are you fucking kidding me

shorter one was mexican, hair dyed yellow. not really a mohawk but definitely a ridge across the top a little higher than the rest. piercings on the lip. dickies cut off at the knee. two shirts, leather wrist strap. wallet on a chain. work shoes.

taller one wore lipstick. had a nice rack. giggled and then laughed. a lot. smiled at me when i smiled at her.

they sat down to put their bowling shoes on. the shorter one pulled out a can of bud light out of her jacket pocket after looking around first and then cracked it open

giggly put a straw in it.

i was drinking mgd out of a bottle.

within minutes the dude showed up while they were bowling together and pointed at the abandoned beer can avec bendy straw and said is this yours?

i held up my bottle and took a gulp and the teengirls returned from their gutterball and he questioned them as i went for the fries.

we were in hollywood. holly star lanes on santa monica boulevard. not the best part of town. but it was just then.

the dude left.

the can remained.

the one girl punched the other in the leg right before she was about to throw her ball. the ball rolled into the gutter and the other punched the other in the arm. hard.

they were like teenboys, really, except way cuter.

the shorter one asked me if the dude hassled me i said nah.

it made me wonder if she told the guy that the beer was mine.

i wanted to buy them drinks but i wondered if they were underage then i really wanted to buy them drinks and then the other pulled a second can of miller lite out of her jacket pocket.

they put the straw in the new can and wrestled in their seats. one holding ones head and fake-biting a huge chunk out of her thick head.

before i knew it their game was over, half their can of beer had spilled over as the only loser of the punching fight wrestling match. they took off their shoes and walked over to the snack bar.

and then me and john woo and travis k smiley could finally concentrate on our form.

in peace.

alone.

until three lesbians walked into a bowling alley.

they were black and this was true.

i couldnt be happy without splinky

i linked your ass a long time ago, but that’s not why i’m emailing. i just wanted to say thanks for the link the other day, and to apologize for something i said on your comments a long time ago.

i believe i said i wouldn’t donate any money to your flowage for some ass reason, but you being the cool guy that you are didn’t rip me, you just offered up your opinion, or something along those lines.

i’ve recently had a perspective changing experience in my life, along with a little growing up, and i believe differently now.

over the course of my blog perusing the last few months, i’ve seen complete strangers offer up all sorts of different gifts, from hand-made hats, to cookies, to cd’s, to books, and probably a ton of other stuff i missed.

at last glance, it looks like you were up to 78 out of your goal of 1600. the old me might have tried to call bullshit, and ask if you’re really saving this money for a car. the new me says who cares if you are or not, it’s up to the individual if they want to believe it is or not. and while i can’t personally account for the remaining amount all at once, i will be contributing to the cause.

if you could just reply (i know you’re busy, and if i don’t get a response, it won’t bother me) and let me know how much paypal takes out for the donation so i can make it an even amount, that would be great.

and of course, love the site.

hope you get the time to read this.

vladmir

+++++++++++++

Dear Vlad,

thanks for the kind words.

OF COURSE i will be using the flowage to the car fund for a car. sheesh.

i know that “nothing in here is true” but thats true. i would be kicked off the internet as the biggest bullshitter of all if i did anything inappropriate with those funds.

the car fund experiment is one of my favorite little things about the busblog.

for those of you who dont know, i am trying to see how long it takes to get $20k for a new car off my blog.

its an art project science fair experiment of sorts.

if you look on the left hand side of my blog you will see the names of the people who have already flowed the blog. and if someone flows that day i will include their number with a link to their blog somewhere in a post.

79. sara

80. august mueller

if it takes 20 years to get the ride then we will know that it takes 20 years. hopefully it will take less.

i dont talk about the flow that often cuz i dont want to bore you with it and i dont want this thing to be an ongoing pledge drive, but i do like the experiment cuz its a super long term thing and people hardly ever do super long term things in blogs.

as for PayPal, thanks for concerning yourself with it, but generally you shouldnt. its cool. however, just so you know Paypal takes about eighty cents out of each $20 flow.

thanks!

Tony

james + bunnie mac + planet sara

but i bet he was called lots of other names.

pabby.

so.

cass.

with initials like mine, you can imagine the nicknames i was called.

tp never bothered me much.

when they would just straight up calling me Toilet Paper, well that was interesting.

but being the only black kid in school for most of my life, the n word was tossed around from time to time.

strangely that never bothered me much either.

names dont bother me. words dont bother me. very little bothers me.

the cubs and their mediocrity bothers me.

people who believe a president who has obvious personal agendas sorta bother me, but not much.

people who stand next to each other in escalators annoy me way more than pretty much anything nowadays.

if you really want to get me in a pissy mood, clog the escalator in the morning and look at the ceiling. maybe turn around and say “cubs suck.”

in other news i went bowling last night and flirted with some lesbians.

only bowled a 137.

i was only sorta drunk.

afterwards i slurred loveable words to my truest and she giggled. i told her that no offense to anyone else but i have yet to feel a connection to another person like what i feel with her.

she said she felt the same thing.

i said lets go to britneys chapel in vegas and get hitched.

she said what about the paparazzi.

i sad f the poppies.

she said what about the maloof brothers.

i said f them too.

she said what about the fact i dont feel that way about you any more.

i said, hmmm.

then she told me she had quit smoking thanks to an out of date book that karisa got her.

and i fell for her even deeper.

malatemail + janelle + true