my maid had a pot of pasta waiting for me when i got home. pretty nice of her since i have used her for a month. i only got her because this one chick said shed come over more if my house was cleaner. i do dumb things for girls. i wouldnt have a cell phone if it wasnt for one girl. i wouldnta stopped dating for a while there if it wasnt for anothern. and a third some say was the reason behind my bald new look.

problem im having with one of em is, you know what, never mind. everyone loves me. my maid made me supper.

i think she probably saw that i left a box of noodles out.

then i think she probably saw a nice jar of organic tomato sauce a hippy chick gave me for christmas that i never ate.

then while she was cleaning out the fridge, emptying the diet dr peppers from the 12 pack and into the bottom shelf she spied some hot dogs that were itching to spoil next to a green pepper and a red pepper long forgotten but hanging in there.

and that sweet woman

whom i have never met

mixed it all together and hopefully ate a bowl herself and left me with this awesome pot of surprising love.

i know a lot of people have suspected, but no i have never taken steroids.

no, i wont piss in a cup, i want you to believe me when you ask me personal questions, but no, i never did.

i dont care that bonds did and sheff and giambi did, but i didnt.

i blog three times a day, get in fights with dcupped angels over launching websites, and i write while im falling asleep because i love to. not because of roids.

ive told you before

fuck barry bonds.

the other meesh + houseplant + james

not only is this venezuelian woman chucking rocks with her wrist rocket but shes doing it in hiphuggers and her workout top with a ponytail. if only she was aiming at a starbucks there in caracas.

i’ll take a ticked off pilates instructor with a slingshot over 4 kids throwing rocks any day.

its lightening and thundering here in hollywood so theyve grounded me and chopper one and so im listening to dinosaur jr and wearing the gay hat that miss montreal gave me. its supposed to be one of those sorta trendy skull caps that all the kool kids are sporting but ive never been a kool kid. not fashionably so.

i need a shopping spree. i want to write a story about a boy and a girl who steal a car in the middle of the night and steal a crowbar and drive through the window of a melrose hipster clothes store and run out with handfuls of the latest threads and some vintage peices and some pimp hats and several pairs of pumas.

and get in a cab and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh.

and then asking the cabbie to stop at pinks he says sure and they get him a big chicago dog with extra tomatoes and they drive into the hollywood hills laughing and kissing and ultimately crying cuz its just all too emotional not for the girl but for the boy.

joan and melissa rivers were on the view today.

that i know this proves that this hat is gay.

if i was gay i would be making a lot more money.

watched forever eden last night with clipper girls cousin. we’re like an old married couple. we sit there and hold hands and read magazines and occassionally glance up at the screen, just waiting for bedtime for an album side of passion and then a little sleep of the just.

we know its over for us. i like her cousin better anyway but her cousin isnt talking to me cuz she told me not to do her cousin and i thought she was bluffing but whe wasnt.

only thing i didnt like about forever eden is they tell you whats going to happen WHILE youre watching the show.

what they do is right before they go to commercial they go, “coming up next on forever eden…”

and then they show you the conflict thats about to go down.

um, excuse me, im 20 minutes into your show! im watching it! im in! no need to tell me the juicy parts so i dont flip away.

if you havent given me reason to stay with the first 20 minutes of your show, what makes you think that telling me whats going to happen is going to keep me?

dumbshits.

i might have to protest watching Forever Eden if they keep that shit up.

and who are these people who WANT to know?

and why do they always end up on my couch adusting their garters?

think my man bill shakespeare woulda stood for that shit?

coming up next in MacBeth… Lady MacBeth goes ca-razzzy… and if these woods are rockin, dont ye bother knockin…

i need a vacation.

dear fragrant, if im not your number one fan it’s cuz you delete before i can read your stuff, email me everything you post, thank you + britcoal + bunnie

it’s always 2am. the clock speeds through when i sleep. it speeds through while i work. it speeds through when i get home. and then always its wham 2am fucker.

raspil and i have never heard each others voice, and yet we’ve teamed up wonderfully through emails and very few chat sessions to bring lick back to life.

the other day she gave me the new layout for the blog and today i put it in the template section in blogger and of course i didnt back up the old one. or even take a picture. and there was the new layout but the text was crazy all over the place.

so i emailed ms. iverson and she was soon online and we looked at the code and she gave me a different layout and it worked.

but then the comments didnt work.

and i of all people i figured it out

which is saying a lot because i really dont know html all that well and i certainly dont know java or java script or pearl or nothing.

but i looked at the code of this blog and i compared things and i figured it out.

and while i was looking to add the halo scan button i read on their site that they now have Trackback.

so i installed Trackback.

to me, trackback rewards people for linking.

lets say 100 people read a post and two people Trackback. i bet 25 of those people go to the Trackbacker’s blog.

until now Trackback was only available to blogs that used moveable type.

now blogger blogs using haloscan can have Trackback.

thanks haloscan!

which is free.

but accepts donations, which i highly recommend.

speaking of which, chokey chicken and mist bought my afro and chokey asked me to make them a mixed cd to include with the hair. i was going to give them some baseball cards.

well, today i made the cd.

tomorrow i will mail it, fellas.

email me your address again 🙂

bluecad + chokey chicken + mist + lick blog