reuters reports that sean penn spent $56k

to call the president an asshole. okay, he didn’t say asshole, but he did buy a full page ad to say that he disagreed with blowing iraq to hell.

“bombing is answered by bombing, mutilation by mutilation, killing by killing.

“I beg you, help save America before yours is a legacy of shame and horror,” Mr. Penn wrote, so says Reuters, but where is the full ad? where’s the entire damning transcript?

if Chuck Heston had put out a similar ad back in the days of Clinton, a guy like Matt Drudge would have had that shit on his web page transcribed with a nice big picture of Moses next to it.

But since Drudge is nothing more than the towel boy at the right wing bath house, he wouldn’t dare “publish” Penn’s pleas.

why have a balanced blog?

and whiners complain that the media is liberal, and i say hogwash. i like saying hogwash. especially when its bullshit that i’d rather scream. so instead i resort to saying hogwash.

i say hogwash today because i go to the Instapundit and i don’t see Penn’s transcript. i go to Little Green Footballs and i see that some other actors have chipped in to decry the war cry, but i don’t see their ad either, instead they get called “high profile idiots on the anti-American left”, because apparently freedom of speech is anti-American when it comes from the left. i go to blogdex, nada. welch, layne, jarvis, no one has it.

i may as well be in russia. dissenter? kill him or ignore him, but at all costs, dont pick on king george.

what’s a brother got to do to get his words read after he puts his money where his mouth is and gives the raspberry to the commander in chief?

i thought you people ran political blogs focused on this war on terror?

you cant seriously tell me that this isn’t newsworthy.

its only newsworthy when you talk tough? or some wonk in congress? or if The Factor says it on his show? i’ve seen m-f’ing Bill O’Reilly being quoted and bits of his show being shown on tv this last month more times than i’ve seen the President and the Vice President combined. think about that. theres a sniper in DC, congress said it’s cool to bomb, the prez even addressed the nation, still i see O’Reilly’s mug on the screen almost as much as i see Regis’s. now how is that a liberal media?

sean penn married madonna, people. he was in fast times at ridgemont high as a stoner surfer! he punches paparazzi. his new wife is a complete piece of ass. and now he does the right thing and where are the so-called reporters?

what more does a man have to do to get a little attention? shoot innocent people from a van?


all these so called war bloggers arent anything more than what the rest of the press is: followers.

if cnn ran the transcript, then everyone would link to it. but because the washington post or reuters doesn’t want to give penn any more press than what he paid for, the news dies in the fish wrap of record.

pardon me, but it is news when a big time, a-list, real deal movie star puts out a full page ad and publicly calls bullshit on the president of the united states in a time of war.

and pardon me once again, friends, but now im going to have to call bullshit on you.

to get the medal of bs removed from your good names, either write down and put on your blog the damning words of mr. penn, or link to someone who has the entire transcript of the ad.

otherwise i will consider you nothing more than another towel boy like drudge.

i’ve been trying to break off things with ashley for years.

why? because im insane.

strangely, ashley never lets me break up. no matter what i say.

the other day right before my softball game, i went over to her online diary to see if she wrote about me, and i saw that for the second day in a row she wrote about how much she loved her first boyfriend ever, who i think is an idiot. so i told her that its obvious that she needs to either finish things up with him, or pursue him or end things with him before she starts hanging out with someone else. but in the meantime, i told her, she needs to lose my phone number and return the keys to my mansions.

she thought i was kidding but i wasn’t kidding. plus i had a softball game to go to so i hung up on her, something that i rarely do.

so we tied at softball. lame, i know. and when i got home i showered, went to bed, and was not disturbed by a tearful phonecall from orange county and i was grateful.

now, says that he wants me to tell the truth more in these entries, so here goes, bro.

theres good news and bad news for letting the hotties have keys to your crib. the good news is they can show up and make their selves comfy while you’re saving the world and when you come home they can be lounging in the lazy boy in high heels and garterbelts.

the bad news is they can break into your home when you’re least expecting it.

got home last night through the back door.

first thing i notice is a trail of little candies leading to the great hall. there the candies formed a heart. in the middle of the heart was a hand written sign that said:

tony, october is the month of tricks and treats, follow the path to find your reward

i was scared. what would i find? i saw that one trail of candies led to the front door and one led to the bedroom.

i followed the one to the front door and considered flying to the beach house.

instead i shut the drapes, turned off the lights and followed the treats up the spiral staircase to my bedroom.

i could smell candles. i was hoping i wouldn’t find a blood soaked corpse and a dramatic farewell note.

i’m barely a reason to click over to while killing time on the web, im certainly not worth


opened the door and saw a blond girl with her back to me, laying in my bed with a pink plaid miniskirt, knee high f me boots, and a see thru black blouse.

mama mia!

made sure she was alive with a few curious pokes with my pointy finger, stirred the tearful princess, hugged, and reconciled.

my life couldn’t be stranger, i am not a handsome man. my little castle only has one spire. my moat’s not heated and instead of a pet dragon all i attract in it are ducks and algae. in the summer it sorta reeks.

why do i end up with a special guest star in my home sniffling back her tears apologizing and saying she’ll do anything that i want? it’s not because of my mighty sword. its not because of my tangy cous cous. and it’s definitely not because of my unlimited supply of simpsons memorabilia.

i think it happens because i avoid it.

what you resist persists, they tell me.

and lord knows i resist absolute good for some reason.