tsar


the viper room
8/19/2005

cars only make you fat and give you the false sense of security that you can get across town faster than you can

which of course makes you late

so when the valet dude at red rock says that its gonna cost you $20 to park your $800 car, you say fine and you thank God that money grows on trees

however when the doorman of the famous rock club holds you up and makes you wait on the wrong side of the velvet ropes when there is no line you might wanna smack his bitch up.

but you’ll wait patiently cuz youre late and this is what happens to people who are late theyre at the mercy of immigrant valet dudes and short stupid suddenly powerful doormen who wont get to see the best band in LA because their job is to kick it at the curb and watch the beautiful people come in and out and have a great time

has tsar started, i asked him

not yet he said back, and i said a little prayer to the Lord and thanked him not only for letting me do what i did that made me late

but for letting me not miss my favorite band

so i stood there and rolled through my rolodex of insults that i wanted to unfurl on this fellow with a tuxedo jacket, mullet, and little tiny baby moustashe; but i held back because even though im the champ of on-the-spot insults, this dude has heard them all and i didnt pay $20 not to get into the viper room

and one of the things i wanted to say was, dont you know who i am, but his comeback would have been

a) no
b) dont you know where you are
c) famouser people have died where youre standing so shut up

and i felt better when two super hot chicks showed up and he made them stand behind me.

adn then the singer from the offspring showed up and he made him stand behind them

and then he checked my id and said anthony pierce? ever read tony pierce? to which i said fuck blogs which made the ladies giggle.

got in and told the cashier the magic word which was “destroyers” which meant i only had to pay her $10 to climb the stairs.

people ask me why i dont ask to be on tsar’s guest list and thats not how the santa barbara mafia rolls. pay for your shit. guest lists are for record exec scumbags and others who have tiny penises. at my advanced age i see very few rock shows, i dont mind laying out top dollar for bands that i know will deliver and tsar always comes through.

plus i hardly ever call the guys to even say hi, what cheapskate would i be if the only reason i called their manager was to take money out of their pocket?

earlier in the evening i watched the boys play on G4’s “attack of the show” which used to be called the “screen savers”. and if you remember, when i was on the show almost a year ago i wore my tsar tshirt (heres video of my appearance).

well yesterday tsar played two songs on national tv, “love explosion” and “startime”, and it was super freaky cuz the sound was sorta bizarre and it made it seem like they were on some european mtv show cuz the vocals were way up and the music was low and theres no audience so it was psycho.

plus i think love explosion is the worst song on the album and i seriously cant believe that theyre gonna make that the next single. theyve got five real rock songs on that record. glorious tunes. im not sure exactly why theyd pick love explosion other than to pander to the soft rock girls of the world but i think thats a terrible mistake thats certain to slow whatever momentum they have going.

startime, straight, wrong, and conqueror worm, all rock in a way that most bands would die for. to present love explosion to the world when you have those other tunes in your pocket is like leaving money on the table.

if youre capable of throwing 100 mph heat right down the middle why fuck around with the change up? especially when your changeup isnt all that spectacular.

i could understand if this was a ballad to end all ballads. or if it was a stairway to heaven that is intricate and weird and builds to this incredible guitar solo, but love explosion is a teenage fanclub/weezer/trl lalalala tune that shouldnt even be on the record if you ask me.

if you go to tsar’s myspace page you’ll see three songs that you can download. youve got the single band+girls+money, youve got straight, and youve got love explosion. and next to each track you have a number as to how many times people have played it.

bgm has been played/downloaded 13,237 times
straight has been played/downloaded 8540 times
and love explosion has been played/downloaded just 4526 times

that tells me that people go back to that site and listen to the two songs that they like and they do not re-play the song that they dont like.

the kids do not like love explosion. their number one fan does not like love explosion. i couldnt care less that the sex pistol’s guitar player played it. who knows why he played it. maybe hes 91273409871234 years old and cant listen to real rock any more because it makes him sad that he cant make that music any more.

but when you have an arsenal of rock up your sleeve you dont hold back, in my book, you go full steam ahead

just like they do in concert

just like they did last night on the sunset strip

you open with a bang, you sustain, you build you climax, and when things are in need of a change of pace you pull out love explosion but you end with the rockers

its tsar’s mission to bring back rock music back to rock radio.

the lord has been kind enough to channel that music through them in a way that no other band has been blessed lately

to get behind the mule when you have a buffalo is in my humble opinoin a gigantic mistake.

and i drank and i enjoyed the rock last night and even after the valet couldnt find my car and made me stand there in that lot as drunk sloppy rich kids squawked on their cell phones to their friends about which party they were going to go to next i wondered if i could be totally wrong about all of this and i hoped that i was because all i want is the best for my friends who happen to be in the best band in la.

and i noticed that they played an hour last night, which is longer than they normally do, and on monday i will have a video of their opening number so you too can experience the majesty that i was afforded, which noone can put a dollar amount on.

xtx + melting dolls + smelly + kitty bukkake

hi drugs and alcohol

you rang?

me? no.

oh, thought you did.

no, wrong tony.

youre the one who’s teenage princess doesnt want you any more, right?

temporarilly.

wow, youre really in denial and youre not even drunk yet.

just trying to stay positive.

haha. yeah, good luck on that one.

its not easy. but im a libra. we bounce back pretty fast.

let me ask you this, what would your hero do?

Jesus? probably pray. then do the math, that theres 3 million people in LA, half are women, half are the right age, half of them are hot. half of them are available.

so like 125,000 single hot babes in LA?

not counting orange county.

yeah, you probably shouldnt count that county, since now theres one more available babe there.

are you trying to make me depressed?

who, us? depressants? what about your other hero, charles bukowski, what would he do?

drink.

he would, wouldnt he?

then maybe go to a three dolla ho.

didnt he always seem happy?

in a drunken bum loser homeless man way, yes.

and isnt there a lesson there for you?

yeah, kill yr idols.

she doesnt want you anymore.

most girls dont.

she’d rather get sloppy with a teenboy.

finally she listened to me.

theres no hot chicks in LA who want you.

none?

you tell me, when was the last time you got any?

this weekend.

liar.

i shit you not.

a fluke, im sure.

arent they all?

dont you want some rum?

yes, please.

dont you want some sticky green bud?

definatley.

how about some x?

no fun doing x without someone you can kiss.

how about some pain killers?

they make me dizzy.

how about a nice cold frosty one at a strip bar?

i have to save up for aruba.

taking a hot chick?

i was gonna suprise ashley.

nuh huh.

yeah.

god, that sucks.

yeah.

so what are you gonna do?

im gonna ask this sweet girl at work for her number.

but youre having terrible luck, she wont give it to you.

50-50 chance.

how do you figure?

she’ll either say yes or no.

no, she might not like guys, she might not like black guys, she might not like you, she might be taken, she might have aids, she might like guys with cars, she might…

50-50 chance. plus she smiles at me in the halls. 75% chance.

if she says no wont you be crushed?

listen, nothing is worse than someone who really really really knows you rejecting you. if someone who doesnt know you rejects you, theyre just rejecting the outside part, the facade, my facade isnt all that impressive.

well, we’ll be here if things dont work out.

thanks, drugs and alcohol. you do smell good. what is that?

armeretto.

i love armeretto.

and humbolt purple haired chronic.

wow, you must be expensive.

didnt you say yesterday you found $60 in a book?

yeah.

thats how much a bag costs.

when did you get so expensive?

you call that expensive, that’s like a month’s worth. $60 is like a couple round of drinks at a bar.

and no hangover.

and you must want to smoke something since you are kicking the habit and all.

trading one addiction for another, nah, no thanks.

you really are a boring ass midwestern christian boy, arent you?

i guess so. never thought of that.

ok, well good luck with the sweet nice girl.

thanks devil water and narcotics!

we love you, by the way.

you do?

yes, very very very very much.

youre so sweet.

yeah. k, bye.

dc + stolen swan + zulieka has bad dreams too

on days like these that just speed by

when the bad guys just lay on the curb waiting to die, as blood drains between the grates in the sewers and little kids cry

i sit on the bumper of an undercover smoking the remains of a marlboro 100 and i wonder when mi vida loca will be over and not so loca.

im always feeling like im wasting my life, like im blowing some great shot at something big. i see those guys at google, how young they are, how super rica theyre about to be. i wonder what they will do with that power.

if i was a billionaire i know straight up what id do after buying the cubs and tearing down the lights of wrigley, i’d fucking retire. i wouldnt do shit. and i know thats why the lord hasnt given me my financial freedom.

i watch the olympics and i see everyone swimming and i wanna swim. i wanna go to greece where no one is and i wanna do the breast stroke. i wanna lose to puerto rico.

i see kids coming home from school and i say hey why are you in school its august and the kids go si and i go but porque and they go its year round school mister and i go when the fuck did i become a mister.

and i see my belly and i know the answer to that one.

and the gray nostril hairs and the gray nut hairs and the gray chest hairs.

sometimes i wonder what this blogd be like if i had gotten a job with the la times back in the day when they shoulda hired me when i was coming straight outta iv. i wonder if i would be playing the dumb game today of trying to prove that the president is a fucking retard to a group of people who will never admit that the president is a fucking retard.

ever.

the same people who are all, but kerry thought he was in cambodia and he was still in Nam! but kerry took his medals and threw them away. but kerry is a flip flopper.

first flip flopper i ever met was your momma i wanna tell em. she was laying there on my waterbed smiling and i said flip that fat ass over so i can see it.

yeah im glad i was never an la timeser cuz i wouldnt be able to keep it real for your asses and even the naysayers secretly want me to keep it real.

so real it’ll be kept.

splinky asked me in an email about danielle and i was all, shes just a girl who i work with, and danielle read it and huffed off in a huff.

i saw her at the flowerstand during lunch and i was all youre a sagitarrius, thats the wrong sign baby. and she violently ripped the leaves from the stems of the tulips.

1908 she kept mumbling. i was all what? she said it louder

nine teen ooooooooh eight! cuz she knew that was the only way she could get to me.

i said keep it up, its one reason i hate san diego and hope it burns in a terrible fire and that causes an earthquake slash tsunami and it all falls into the ocean.

she was all what does 1908 have to do with san diego? i was like san diego in 1984 got in the way of the cubs and for that i will never forgive them until they apologize like crazy.

she was all, youre loco.

i was all so.

then we took pictures and she said ok are we cool then and i said yeah.

and she said are you gonna visit me down in the valley. and i was like no.

and she was all are you gonna visit me. and i was all maybe.

and she was all are you going to be my friend and take the train and visit me.

and i said can we go to mexico and she said si.

so i said si too.

– from the busblog a year ago yesterday on danielles last day at the xbi

the busblog was pretty good that week + keeping it real + sanity adrift

why am i in such a good mood?

i didnt have the greatest day at work today. i didnt meet a beautiful girl who wanted to end my summer shutout. i didnt get my last unemployment check in the mail yet which i will blow on consumer electronics and strippers. i didnt grow four inches last night – where it mattered.

could it be this C2? could that be the source of the euphoria? could it be the midnight tacos carne asada burrito with cheese and sour cream no onions por favor? could it be that i forgot that my house is sparkling clean? could it be that every time i check my comments people say the nicest things?

could it be that a month off the pipe has made me more suseptable to higher highs and lower lows but for some reason the lows that i had in my last job are going to be pretty tough to dive down into therefore the higher highs is all ive got coming my way?

could it be the moon. the beautiful moon. full and white and bright and close as if it was trying to say this evening hi tony hi tony hi tony hi!

could it be that im superstoked that my favorite band tsar is playing tomorrow night (friday) at one of the coolest clubs in all of hollywood if not THE coolest club johnny depps the viper room across the street from the whiskey down the street from the roxy and the rainbow and down the street from the famous tower sunset.

could it be that ive hit my second wind. could it be that big brother fucking kicked ass today could it be that being bobby brown always makes me wanna dance with somebody.

could it be that my spidey senses are tingling cuz something goods gonna come down the road in the form of a curvey coed who knows me and likes me and wants to do all the things i wanna do and some that i never knew i wanted to do. and shes got either a hottub or access to one.

could it be that this week ive been buying things and for a man who never buys things that these things are totally useful things – a new cell phone, and today a sirius car stereo with an aux jack for my ipod – and i love spending on myself once in a blue moon.

could it be that the cubbbies are winning and today they didnt lose so thats as good as a win. could it be that im going to write an email to my last gf and teller hi and teller that i misser and teller that i wanna caller and teller that i hope one day she will truly forgive me for how rotten i was to her.

could this great feeling be due to the fact that even though i didnt have the greatest day at work that i see that ive already made it through most of the initial tough parts and ive done ok. not good, but ok. i didnt majorly fuck up, and i had lots of chances to majorly fuck up.

there are several points in your career when things get really hard: at the begining when youre realizing truly what the job is and if it isnt what you like you’ll wanna quit, in the middle when you realize truly how the career path is going and if isnt what you want you’ll wanna cry and then quit, and at the end when you least expect it and youre let go over some bullshit lie but its really just a blessing from the Lord above cuz hes got something up his sleeve for your ass and it involves the coolest part of town and wearing shorts every once in a while.

maybe im happy cuz i wore shorts today.

its nice to wear shorts to work, and even though i probably wont be wearing shorts to work again it was nice wearing them today and it was nice going to best buy and talking to a black dude who turned out to be jamacian which always throws me, and having him know EXACTLY the answer to my question which was, “do you have a good car stereo with about 20 watts per channel that has a cd player that will play mp3s and an aux input for my ipod and can you make sure that it costs under $200 because thats how much i made off my ads last month and if i have ads i want them to pay for shit like this. and he said yes mon and pointed me to the jvc.

ah best buy why are you so good to me.

and yes i will get your four year warrantee because im going to wear that mother out and although i love jvc because of their bells and whistles i know that thier shit breaks all the time because of their bells and whistles and im no fool.

in fact when i used to sell stereos i used to tell people if youre shoving something into a device every day and if that device has motors that whir and rotate thousands if not millions of times a day you should get the warrantee.

dont get warrantees, i used to say, for things that are solid state like tvs or amplifiers or computer monitors.

and excuse me but now im going to dance around my clean house like joel in risky business and think about the next girl who will get to see me topless.

john and his dog + great bukowski poem + (not safe for work) sexoteric + sk smith is writing a novel

two years ago

today on the busblog

in the last 24 hours at least 3,000 swedes have made it through the recall impeachment photo essay which is pretty good numbers for a sunday, but considering its probably monday in stockholm maybe this is what one can expect when one is linked on Buzz.se.

how ever you say thank you and welcome and thanks for checking it out in Swedish here’s me saying it: _________, Swedes.

a few weeks after turning 21 i found myself in sweeden and i had a marvelous time. the people were warm hearted and generous, beautiful and friendly. most american travelers head south to Greece, i chose the northern route of Sweeden and Denmark and i think i made the better choice.

danke, amigos. je t’aime.

last night in glendale, the best band in america played a top secret undercover friends and family-only show in the quaint and empty bar called The Scene on colorado blvd.

it was a show booked earlier in the week by local faves Psoma, who apparently kept it a secret show too as maybe a dozen of the bands’ closest friends were in attendence to hear psoma rock harder than this blogger has ever heard them rock.

it was pretty impressive.

“yeah, i like to play guitar,” blue eyed front man Justin admitted, visably beaming, sweaty, and proud after his bands performance.

then tsar climbed on stage and carved rock a new a-hole blazing through a dozen new songs that made it impossible to ignore.

these are your new princeses, sweden. these are the vikings youve left behind. theyve grown up strong and mighty and have a message from another time.

the energy was so good that my old girlfriend wanted to start a fight with an armenian man who was playing pool. he looked at her like she was crazy. she is crazy. fortunately when i extended my hand she furiously took it and sat on my lap and then realized who i was, her sweetheart, and sat on my lap and told me how happy she was to be watching tsar with me, and i told her that i was happy to be watching tsar with her.

then we kissed several times.

then we stood outside with the kids as we should on a hot summer night in southern california as the stars became jealous as has become normal for them on nights when tsar plays indoors.

i didnt see my old hero springsteen last night.

and today i dont regret a damn thing.

tsar plays the viper room tomorrow night on hollywood’s sunset strip

my maid came over today.

yes i have a maid. in hollywood its a requirement cuz they know guys like me can be pigs.

when i lost my job in may i also lost my girlfriend, so the plan this summer was to sit in my stench and smoke weed and beat off and not do shit until it started getting cold.

after i took a little trip to las vegas i quit smoking weed and i found myself new employment. best laid plans and all that.

so the other day when my friends came over to party with me i realized that i had a really funky apartment. not funky in a good way. funky in a did-i-really-not-do-my-dishes-for-three-months way.

today my maid took care of all that.

ive got a pretty good deal going with her. she used to work for the old lady upstairs for just above minimum wage. i told her id double that wage and tip her on top of it. so for $40 she does all the great things youd want a maid to do for you.

each time she comes over i usually have something extra that i ask her for.

this week there were two main issues. the first was the sink. i promised her that id soak the dishes before she came over. the second was the fridge. some raw meat bled all over the bottom of the fridge. i asked her to scrub that out real good.

for her troubles i gave her an extra twenty bones. so basically sixty bucks for what the old lady would have paid her $20 for. needless to say she loves me and does extra cool things for me.

no, not that, pervs. ive never met her. we do all our transactions by phone. sometimes she will have a pot of homemade soup for me, sometimes she will have a pie in the fridge cooling for my ass. today she put my duvet cover over my duvet, folded my shirts, and patched up my favorite pajama bottoms.

god i love her.

i feel clean all of a sudden. i feel like a man again. i feel like i can ask a girl to come over and i might even feel ok with her walking around my hardwood floors barefooted. how she accomplished some of this is beyond me because someone seemed to have entered my home last week and swiped my broom, and only my broom.

im watching high fidelity right now.

im about to open up john madden ’06.

im contemplating reviewing some porn that just arrived in the mail

but im so tired i might just see whats new with madden and call it a night.

im old, america. so old.

im so old if in a month my house is the same shape it was this morning and a hot babe said you can either give me sixty bucks for twenty minutes of hot action or you can give it to your maid id no question give it to my maid.

thats old.

and the cubs are coming back.

bored housewife + sleepless in sarasota + pics of tsar playing to huge crowds

is there anything worse than a coward?

a liar? perhaps. but not really. theres something basic and instinctual about lying. kids do it and for some reason the practice isnt as repulsive as straight up pussying out of something because youre a chickenshit.

ive built a pretty decent following with a blog that straight up says “nothing in here is true” and hardly anyone gives me a hard time for it, but if i backed down from a dare, or if i refused to answer certain questions, or if i weasled my way out of a mess that id created without answering to those who ive directly affected i doubt i would have the readers that i have now.

which brings us to the president of the united states and his neverending plunge into the depths of becoming the worst “leader” we’ve ever had.

not only is this “war” in iraq becoming officially fubar, but now he doesnt have the courage to meet with a woman, cindy sheehan, who is camped out infront of his ranch because he’s afraid that she’s going to ask him the tough questions that the liberal press wont ask.

the questions i believe would begin with wtf.

“wtf did my son die in iraq for?”

simple enough question for a simple enough man.

by trying to ignore her and not take her up on her request for a 20 minute sit-down, or even a lunch, bush is basically saying, “i can barely speak english, the last thing im going to do is try to bullshit you, so i’d rather hide out on my ranch and pretend to play cowboy with condi and all the other sellouts on my staff.”

this woman’s son was an altar boy, an eagle scout, an honor student, and then a marine. he’s now dead. she’s camping out in front of the presidents ranch to ask him “what honorable cause did my son die for?”

if the president wants to continue the current lie of “to help bring freedom to iraq” he can do that, but i think he pisses his pants worrying about what her follow up will be which is “saddam was caught over a year ago, and btw when we were first gearing up for iraq all you kept talking about were wmds, terrorism, and 9/11… you didnt really mention freeing any repressed people, you talked about how we’d be met with flowers and candies.”

odds are she might cry when she asks these questions, and seriously, who wants to handle tough questions with a crying mom when youre on a five week vacation

in the middle of a war

as gas prices are soaring

and your honesty ratings are sinking

and your party is splitting apart

and the only way you can get people into office is to sneak them in when congress is on their recess?

shit if i was a coward id hide out on my ranch too, with the ac on high.

and not talk to a woman.

and id sit and laugh as my neighbors fired shotgun shells over this grieving mom’s head, and id giggle as pick up trucks ran over the crosses laid down near her encampment, and id sneer as fred the beetle barnes calls her a crackpot and o’reilly talked shit about her, and id look at the clock and wait for my term to expire before i fucked up this country even more and helped kill even more innocents.

if i wasnt a coward id invite her personally to lunch on my ranch and id say your son died in americas best interests, he died protecting iraqis who might not even know how important this time in history is, he died doing the work that many dont have the guts to do, and although it might seem in vain right now, it isnt.

and i would do my best not only to let her put her misery and grief to rest, but i would do my best to show her a bigger picture which her son played an important role.

instead bush is going to squander this opportunity and turn it into a bad thing that only gets worse with each day. finally the peacenicks have a groundzero and a martyr to rally behind.

meanwhile the president looks like the coward that he’s always been. the one who wont talk with the naacp, who has held fewer press conferences than any other president, and now a weasle who cant even take a meeting with a woman who actually has a good reason to talk to him.

and hes going to continue to make his party look like the hypocritical blowhards that its looking more and more that they are.

because anyone who is still supporting this sort of activity and this sort of blantant apathy to the families of servicemen and women who are giving their lives for this administration’s beliefs – those supporters are just as bad as the leaders because they are enabling this type of weak spineless visionless clusterfuckery.

even cowboy fans boo their team when they continue to fumble.

to back this president and his current actions – specifically his cowardice with this woman – is exactly the type of sheep-like behavoir that helps create tyrants and tragedies. and contributes to abuses like we have yet to see.

a bullshit from the backrow is one thing, but one from the front row, especially when its needed, gets the train back on the track.

and if ever there was a time for the Right to call bullshit on this president, its right about now.

unless of course, you’re just as cowardly as he is. in which case, keep smiling and pretending its all good in the hood.

buchannan: the bottom is falling out of the support for the prez + daily show + meet with cindy.org

ashley doesnt like it

when i talk about politics. shes not the only one.

she wrote in and said that if she took a picture of she and her sister in catholic girl skirts would i just shut up and write about her.

i said, bribery and flattery will get you everywhere.

she enclosed the following picture and told me that i am the sexiest man she’s ever known.

::sigh:: if only she loved me for my mind.

ashley is finishing up her summer vacation in las vegas this weekend. the family took a quick trip to sunny palm springs followed by a spur of the moment excursion to the happiest place on earth and then back to vegas for more heat. ashley loves it hot. i do too.

this weekend her daddy’s gonna buy her a car, which is going to be an interesting situation because that means that she will probably be making more trips up to see me than what has been the norm.

in my quest to help her find boys her own age, i have suggested that she really shouldnt be calling and emailing and hanging with me as much as she does but she just calls me stupid and tells me how much she misses me.

recently Hef emailed me and told me that he has the same troubles with his girfriends which is why he’s up to 6 of the blonde bombshells currently.

“gotta take the good with the bad,” he told me, “plod on the best that you can, dude.”

i like it when older guys say “dude.” it sounds so funny.

there is an old budhist line that goes: what you resist, persists.

this is the first time ive ever pushed a girl away who would have nothing of it.

i cant say it’s terrible.

whats also pretty neat is when people borrow from my style. recently ive seen annessa talk to her blog, kool keith interview several of his personalities simultaneously, as well as various others who take pics from reuters and write around them.

imitation pleases me.

pretty much my whole experience of blogging has been quite a happy little journey of suprising discoveries.

people write in and try to narc on others who are “biting” my style, but i think its fine. humans are animals who grow by mimicking. i dont wear my influences on my sleeve, i plaster them right across my chest: bukowski, e.e., sukenick, royko, layne, welch, vaine, jd salinger, spin, maxim, the man show, howard stern.

after a while ones own personality will come through.

maybe next week will be the week that mine will finally make it here.

lets hope it has been worth the wait.

flagrant + danielle needs a hug + leah + too beautiful

The Genius Of The Crowd

there is enough treachery,
hatred violence absurdity
in the average human being
to supply any given army on any given day

and the best at murder
are those who preach against it
and the best at hate are those who preach love
and the best at war finally are those who preach peace

those who preach god, need god
those who preach peace do not have peace
those who preach peace do not have love

beware the preachers
beware the knowers
beware those who are always reading books
beware those who either detest poverty
or are proud of it
beware those quick to praise
for they need praise in return
beware those who are quick to censor
they are afraid of what they do not know
beware those who seek constant crowds for
they are nothing alone
beware the average man the average woman
beware their love, their love is average
seeks average

but there is genius in their hatred
there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you
to kill anybody
not wanting solitude
not understanding solitude
they will attempt to destroy anything
that differs from their own
not being able to create art
they will not understand art
they will consider their failure as creators
only as a failure of the world
not being able to love fully
they will believe your love incomplete
and then they will hate you
and their hatred will be perfect

like a shining diamond
like a knife
like a mountain
like a tiger
like hemlock

their finest art

– Charles Bukowski, 1966

a girl named fred + zip the pinhead + agora aconteceu + airport sitter