who writes us from mass

tony!

how are you? i miss you very much!! i am in massachusetts right now and it is FREEZING! i have had a crazy weekend so far! i got in on friday night and ended up going to elizur’s to hang out with my brothers. that place seems kind of dead & ghetto these days. weird vibe.

but kelly came (with her friend kelly)- and at one point we were hanging with my bro matt (and his friend matt) and then we left and went dancing downtown springfield to this club, rain. it is the same club that we used to go to 10 years ago- but with the new name to reflect the times. when i went there back in college, it was called the ‘hot club’. the music was TERRIBLE. i don’t know if i have heard a lot of jamaican techno in my life- but apparently it is the thing at this place! and i think the kids might like it! we went to the 80’s/90’s room and it just made it seem like i never left. i did lemon drop shots and danced and danced!

on saturday, i woke up an my sister was pissed at me b/c i didn’t call her. my mom told me on friday night that my sister left b/c she “didn’t want to hang out w/a bunch of 30 year-olds”… so i figured that meant she didn’t want to go out- even though i am NOT 30 yet!!! apparently, she just meant she didn’t want to go to elizur’s. so i asked her why she didn’t call me… and she made it clear that I was

supposed to call her. nevermind that both my brothers and kelly called me. i swear she is absolutely insane. i apologized for the miscommunication but she is still pissed at me…. whatever.

so kelly picked me up on saturday and we went to see kerrie in clinton! so fun! we started drinking at 5 and then partied until like 3:30a.m. i even saw becca too, which was very fun! we chilled all day yesterday and then kelly and i drove back to holysmoke- and i encountered the worst snow storm i have ever driven in. i thought i

was tripping on acid at one point and that the car was standing still and the snow was the only thing moving. i think i had 3 mini-heartattacks!

it is so good to hang out w/kelly and kerrie. kelly and i didn’t even need the radio the entire time b/c we just talked and talked and talked.

i have been fixing my parents computer all morning. they had like 112 spyware-related programs. wtf????

i am about to do tae-bo right now b/c i need to work off all the crap i ate all weekend. if i lived here i would weigh 500lbs. seriously.

tomorrow i am going to boston w/kerrie- i can’t wait!!!! i might have to steal my dad’s car though. i’m not worried- i think i am stronger than him and i have seen enough police chases in l.a. to know how to evade the police. they don’t have hellicopters here so it would be easy 😉

it is hard to read your blog on this computer b/c they only have a dial-up. i am making them get dsl and a new computer before i leave. they have like a 3000 dollar tv… they can at least get something that doesn’t use windows 3.1 anymore 😉 i miss you very much and can’t wait to hang out again!

hope all is well!

love,

*karisa

masslive + steph + treacher

ones where i sit at my desk and do deskwork, days when im not flying chopper one, people will walk by and say

shit tony, why are you still here?

everyone around me has either died or quit or got shot, and ive shot a few of em.

and theres no serious chance of moving up and why would you want to anyway.

the other day someone from accounting came by and said

i know what you make.

and shes definately cute and i was all, but you dont know how much i steal

and she sang, oh yes i doooooo

apparently everyone knows if i steal i give it to the kids nearby

or the hollywood free clinic.

and i was all, fine, how much do i make. knowing that she knew.

and she said, shit.

but one thing ive noticed in california is that the rich arent rolling around town spilling champagne on their tuxedos laughing so loud their monocles pop out and their top hats tumble.

the rich are just as fucked up as anyone.

and i say that seriously. totally not jealously.

and maybe its LA where you might have a fucking sweet pad right in the heart of bel air but you aint shit cuz some other motherfucker has one on the beach in malibu, but then someone else has one in the hollywood hills thats invisible or some shit.

you cant win.

and everyone drives the same mercedes.

and everyone has the same pain in the ass fakebaked hottie on their arm.

and no matter how great you think you are theres magic johnson walking past who has five rings, owns a half billion dollar company that includes franchises of Starbucks and TGIF, has his number hanging in the staples center, and beat aids.

wtf have you done yuppie?

and then hef walks past you

and then dr. dre and snoop dogg

the vast majority of the rich and the allegedly cool are just someone elses bitches here, everyone is owned cuz the bigger you want to get the more you have to sell out to someone freakier and this is the place where the prices are determined i mean where dreams come true, so deal.

and everyones fucked but the poor.

when less than zero came out i knew what it was about. i knew the dude named atiff. even back then in 84 atiff knew. all you have to do is look around and discover that this is the only big city where the mayor never matters and you’ll know why atiff looked at me, went into my bedroom, stole my acdc for those about to rock concert tshirt, levis, and converses and left behind a blaring yellow guicci 80s miami vice suit

atiff who was introduced to my apartment thanks to my roommate david who had just gotten an job as an extra during the credits of rodney dangerfields classic back to school, hes the blonde jewish guy with the funny glasses.

and i dont know why im still here i told the girl from accounting

cute as a cute girl could be.

and for some reason we both turned our eyes to the sunset

and watched chopper one block the sun.

and she said are you here for that?

and i said fuck that.

but only cuz i like saying fuck to things.

why has noone told me that the reverse cowgirl is back? + on being jewish + brooks blog

fascinate me. especially in perfectly good places like the xbi.

lemme put it this way: the xbi is so fucking tight and perfect that you can count the mistakes that ive made this year on one hand.

think about that.

i have a voice activated email system. i just archived this years emails and i stored away 7,500 emails. thats 25 a day or one every twenty minutes.

that doesnt include all the phone calls that i get or all the regular conversations or meetings that i participate in.

so if theres that much communication going on each day, and less than 5 things fell between the cracks, wouldnt you think that the powers that be would not only say, shit man, nice work, but they might even try to find out what the secret was?

they dont wanna find out what the secret was. and if you ask them they will tell you that i just got lucky this year. even though last year youd have a hard time counting my mistakes on two hands.

but no, they dont want to find out the secret of my success, in fact they want to alter the way that i do things even though they are well aware of the fact that ive totally dominated this year.

so much so that the smile that was wiped off my face has returned

with vengance.

little known fact about the xbi: turnover is superhigh.

nobody that was here two years ago is still here. thats how hard it is and how quickly people realize that its a thankless gig.

some people even take paycuts and demotions to leave.

as a matter of fact, no one who was here when i started has a better, higher-paying job within the xbi once they left the department that im in.

so is Chopper One to blame? is it cursed? does it mean that any team member affiliated with Chopper One who wants an actual career should quit and join up with some civilian operation?

probably.

especially when people who can, alter what is working.

in fast-paced situations where mistakes can and do happen each day, i do not recommend changing shit that is working fine.

which is why if i was the Cubs i would have re-signed Clement.

it is also why i blog every day, twice a day:

cuz its working for me.

jaylex + sk smith + zulieka + miss poop

i wonder what she wants.

i hope she knows she can have anything.

i hope all of you know that.

i knew kristin when she was just nineteen she reminds me. i knew her when she was just starting up madpony with her sister.

now shes (still) a big star on the web, and i still get hits from her blog.

shes better than me in so many ways and i dont blame the world.

her life is a real one and its interesting and madpony is just the tip of the iceberg of her accomplishments and im glad ive gotten to know her a little more than than just from her blog.

our oklahoman is super sweet, shes smart, she works hard, shes a great friend, shes a good sister, shes a great daughter, she does pretty much everything right, and she does it in that hot southern accent.

just like the ramones was mostly johnny, madpony was mostly kristin so we probably shouldnt ask for more from her, but it wouldnt suck to get a comeback.

i still dont know enough about sorority girl life in 2005, or what its like to go to a game in norman while their team is top rated and their fans are insane.

or what things are like in her town now that they have to take on southern cal in the orange bowl where they will probably lose.

im glad to learn about shopping and shoes and things like that, but i want even more.

would it be so hard to ask for a photo essay sometime soon?

we’re lucky to have what we have, and you must admit, there arent many kristins.

happy birthday baby.

your biggest fan,

tony

when adrants met kristin + whats your damage + beautiful mistake

it sunk in this weekend that anna is married, for real this time, and’s never coming home.

i dont know why it took so long for me to get it. probably because i have the greatest force field imaginable.

other day this dude was hating on me. someone who i should care about hating on me, but i didnt care. i mocked his hate. i fed off it. i literally turned to rubber and he to glue. it was frightening.

anna called on saturday in the best mood ive heard her in a long time. and i want the best for her. of course i do.

but theres a part of me that still thinks that im the best for her. theres part of me that thinks, shit, astrology alone tells us that im the best for her. theres a part of me that thinks, definately in the sack im the best for her.

she heard how i felt, my silence, and she began to cry, and said, maybe i know whats the best for me, and i said how do you say nonsense in russian.

she laughed.

then cried.

then i wanted to cry.

we hung up and i went through the short list of guys she went out with after me and how she sounded after each first date with them

and i thought, anyone had a chance with her as long as they werent me.

its ideas like that that’ll kill you the big bottle of rum said

redesign the wall, the hookah smokesignaled

use me moaned the porn

but you must keep the sabbath holy

so i just did my laundry

and drove all night

with the radio turned

hella low

17 seconds + rampant + britcoal

that the dude in the classic carol “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” doesnt actually get to go home for Christmas?

“I’ll Be Home For Christmas”

(Gannon, Kent)

I’ll be home for Christmas

You can count on me

Please have some snow and mistletoe

And presents by the tree

Christmas eve will find me

Where the love light gleams

Oh, I’ll be home for Christmas

If only in my dreams

My darling, Christmas eve will find me

Right where the love light gleams

And I’ll be home for Christmas

If only in my dreams

the Library of Congress tells us:

On October 4, 1943, Crosby recorded “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” with the John Scott Trotter Orchestra for Decca Records. Within about a month of its being copyrighted the song hit the music charts and remained there for eleven weeks, peaking at number three. The following year, the song reached number nineteen on the charts.

It touched a tender place in the hearts of Americans, both soldiers and civilians, who were then in the depths of World War II, and it earned Crosby his fifth gold record.

“I’ll Be Home for Christmas” became the most requested song at Christmas U.S.O. shows in both Europe and the Pacific and Yank, the GI magazine, said Crosby accomplished more for military morale than anyone else of that era.

the ohio vote was hacked + welch blogs from france + mc brown

outside of the usa one day, it will be amsterdam.

ive visited three times and have only had great times there.

so when our dutchgirl, justagirl, asked today what movies she should rent since she finds herself in the wonderful dilema of having to see fine films, i made a quickie little list of flicks that she might not have seen.

although she probably has.

the trick is to not just pick great movies, but ones that people probably havent seen before, and ones that might be at a video store in holland.

sadly some of these probably wont be there, but you never know.

1. Buffalo ’66

2. Gummo

3. Brazil

4. My Life As A Dog

5. His Girl Friday

6. My Man Godfrey (’57)

7. The General (’27)

8. Joe Versus The Volcano

9. Don’t Look Back (’67)

10. Starstruck (’82)

11. Welcome to the Dollhouse

12. Party Girl

13. Rushmore

14. Lost In Translation

15. 400 Blows

16. The King of Comedy

17. Being John Malkovich

18. Diner

19. Do The Right Thing

20. American History X

21. Time Bandits

22. A Clockwork Orange

23. Raising Arizona

24. This Is Spinal Tap

25. Animals Are Beautiful People

evil urls rule! + raymi + doc searls