Monthly Archives: February 2004

courtney love is back in court today.

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i dont know why this shit isnt on pay per view. or have the counties sell the feeds to court tv and get a cut of the advertising. people are so lame. nobody knows how to make a buck. only way they know how to fleece america is through speed traps and shaking down the poor.

im not happy to be here today. its cloudy. i dont like seeing LA like this. it deserves more than this. i also hate the fact that we have a big meeting today, every tuesday. its ok if its really a tuesday but because we got yesterday off its a monday. nobody wants to go into a meeting on monday when theres nothing to talk about. it just cuts into the day. it ruins the day to be honest. but still it happens. like clockwork.

nothing good in my life happens like clockwork. maybe i should make sure that Lick happens like clockwork then. stoke the world every sunday night before the Simpsons.

pretty girl just asked me if i had hella writers sending in shit for Lick and i said yeah. she said wow. i said i only did it to impress her, to make her think i was cool. she said she Did think i was cool. i said see.

then she sent me a topless pic.

thanks baby.

karisa went to vegas this weekend. the whiners at the View are in vegas right now. why am i not in vegas right now. why am i here. why arent i traveling the world making everyones damn day. why am i sitting here just getting older and older.

why must i compare myself to bukowski who didnt do shit until he started writing at 35 and didnt really get published till he was 40. i got published right outta school. poems just like him. i would put the rejection letters on my kitchen walls. i thought i would line the walls with the little half sheets but before i could begin to feel sorry for myself i started getting acceptance letters. and even checks.

then the connecticut poetry review misspelled some of my best shit and i swore i would never write for anyone else again.

unless they paid serious money to fuck my shit.

i have the most wrinkled shirt on in the world.

a pretty girl said she liked my hair cut as she walked past and stumbled on her own feet. super cute but my buddy has dibs.

madpony still hasnt updated + read metafilter before it crashes again + azarok

i dont know why i procrastinate at Lick.

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im always so happy when an update is complete.

and raspil makes it so easy.

the writers usually ask me a few questions and then after a while they send me a story. i read it, sometimes i will do something minor to it, but rarely.

then i send it over to raspil and she lays it out and designs it and sends it back to me. i put it on the lick server, tweak it a tad, make a cover, adjust the table of contents and we’re done.

it’s not hard.

the hard part is finding the writers and thanks to the busblog, there are plenty of writers who want to join in.

this week there are eight new peices.

still for some reason i slack. and procrastinate. and not do shit because im slaggin on what is supposed to be a fun experience. im so retarded it’s… retarded.

this week’s lick cover girl is tiffany who surprised me with that picture tonight in a chat and it was perfect just the way it was and i was all please can i use that and she said yes and i was stoked.

tiffany and i have had a very interesting relationship over the last year.

usually it’s something along the lines of

i love you.

no, i love YOU.

and then nothing for a month or two.

i cant say i really know her but what ive read from her blogs and chats she seems exactly like the type of girl i would never approached in school. quiet girls freaked me out.

maybe they still do. maybe thats why i like her. maybe its nice to be freaked out when nothing freaks you out any more.

i like that picture cuz even though shes looking straight into the cam theres still stuff being covered up, stuff being stuffed away, secrets, silences, mysteries, questions.

tiffany is a college gurl but in that pic she looks so young but is that the hairstyle of a highschool girl? maybe. doubt it though. is she happy or sad? hot or cold.

hot is the answer.

lick is the answer.

this girl knows.

special thanks this week to tiffany and to raspil and to mr. os who switched this blog to a new server flawlessly.

dear cubs owners,

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now they have alex rodriguez.

you wouldnt even go after ivan rodriguez yet they now have alex rodriguez.

how is our one sammy sosa gonna beat all of their sammy sosas?

please get some more sammy sosas.

start with greg maddux and quit being fucking pussy ass bitches about it.

i hate you tribune corp.

youre a whole fucking corp and you cant beat one george steibrenner.

youre proving that all a corp means is you cant get anything done and you have a bunch of white shirt wearing old people making six figures.

if i had a corp my corp would beat your corps ass.

id fire anyone who wore a suit and id pass out free fuck tribune corp tshirts.

if we played softball against you i doubt any of you fuckers could hit.

i bet your bats would all be light and your shoes would be new.

there you are in chicago, probably have lots of kids, kids who are cubfans and you come home every day in your car with passenger side airbags and you smile at them but what youre saying is daddys going to be able to send you to college because we’re not going to spend jack shit on the cubs.

your stupid fucking kids are going to college anyway.

get me some sammy sosas before the yanks realize they dont stand a chance to win this year.

happy birthday david + madpony has only 7 posts all year still they get more hits and more comments than me. wtf.

splinky doesnt wanna write there any more

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because of the judgers that are boundto bum her day.

it is impossible to write about what i do or where i go because it’s too much. always, someone out there will have less so why can’t i have some?

shaq isnt ashamed to be the biggest motherfucker in the playground. he won the mvp trophy tonight at the allstar game because he dominated all of the best.

people talk shit about him constantly. his rookie card that used to go for $300 now goes for $42 even though he has rings and mvp awards. fuck the haters.

meanwhile nobody i know likes ryan seacrest and hes all over tv and radio. the people of california elected a governor to see him on tv not ryan seacrest. but ryan seacrest doesnt care that everyone hates him and wish ill upon him and what he represents and those who employ him.

you can have yours baby.

the haters are gonna hate anyway.

give em something good to hate.

and why is it ok for every other joker in the world to make incredibly dull whiny bullshit on the web and you cant do your thing?

theres no need to be arrogant but theres nothing wrong with telling the truth.

havent you learned anything from hip hop.

fucker sells a million records and he will get a platnium hummer a ferarri and a bently

and then they rap about it.

remember on nwas straight out of compton when ice cube bragged

me and lorenzo, cruisin in a benz-o

i want nwa driving mercedeses

i need eazy-e in that shit.

if paris hilton had a tv talk show would you watch it. yes. i would too. im interested in how the other half live.

by other half i mean those on the wessssssside.

why not.

number one tv show right now is about rich orange county pretties.

apparently rich is in, so go for it.

or write on lick

and/or write on lick.

personally i think writing as opposed to speaking is sheild enough, and anonymous blogging is an even better sheild, so use it. i wish i could be an anonymous blogger.

or write about the annoyances of first class.

i asked this girl to come over tonight.

if she doesnt its no biggie.

that to me is worthy of hating.

dc pierson

i had a nice valentines day.

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i hope you did too. very cute young woman picked my ass up and we went to the beverly center for chinese early around 4:20p. traffic was a bitch in la because of the nba allstar festivities which are still going on.

we couldnt even get into the parking lot and she said she knew of somewhere if i liked italian.

i told her that i grew up in the shadow of the italian-american hall of fame. i told her that my first kiss was angela romano. that my long lost lust is tracey degrazia. that my best friend was bob milleta. that my, she was all just say yes or no.

i said yes and we ended up on highland right next to melrose. very close to the mansion that jeanine rents. and she was right it was good and it wasnt crowded and the waiter was awesome and everything was all “no pressure”.

he started us off with some brichotto. then two complimentary glasses of red. he called it “a little taste of tuscanny.” she had pasta i had lasagne. we toasted valentines day. the wine made us warm. she got a little color on her pale cheeks. i wanted to play footsies but shes short and sat indian style in the booth and she quizzed me on facts about her if we ever ended up in the newlywed game.

what size am i?

30?

no 2-4-6-8-10 like that.

oh, 4?

6 silly.

ah.

whats my bra size?

36 D?

yes!

just lucky.

you are lucky.

later i tooker to my place. which was a mess. i wasnt expecting a date. i thought id just write to you and watch tv. she said she didnt care. i got a fire going thanks to a half of a duralog and some wood that i hadnt used all winter.

she tossed me the keys to her t-top. she said she wanted me to pick up some red as she went through the grammys on my tivo. apparently she missed it.

drove over to Jons cuz theyre not on strike. got some merlot and some pink champagne. also a tin of brie and a loaf of french bread. also whipped cream. also milk eggs bacon incase she was spending the night. it was only 8:30p the joys of the early dinner. got back and she had slipped into something totally ridiculous.

white everything. up top, down the legs, snaps, buckles. lil bow in her hair. candles had been lit. porn had been chosen. like christmas except there werent any cards to read. i was lucky, am lucky. i know it. so i represented. right there on the couch.

hard wood floors echo but it was valentines day, no better sound than what was happening. long time ago i learned about the little breaks when youre changing positions. its ok to drink a sip to keep the buzz going. but make it quick. not for you but for her. dont switch positions until youve finished something. we went through a few. i once knew a girl who hated the bedroom. i remembered her as we kept it in the front room. something was on tv. i didnt pay attention. something was on me. it was her she was saying how she loved being a little slut for me. i said is that being a slut. she said yeah. i said you can do better than that baby.

she did.

when we were done we watched the 3 point contest and the slam dunk contest (pictured) and she ate the bread and i ate the cheese since shes lactoce intolerant something i never knew. then we slept restlessly because some people arent meant to sleep in the bed. theyre meant to play there.

nobody sleeps on a basketball court, for example.

and in the morning we ate capn crunch.

there will be a new update to lick tomorrow night.

christina + lisa + nay

it’s nba allstar weekend here in la.

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and everyone is celebrating magic johnsons contribution to the game.

all i have to say is motherfucker makes us forget that he has AIDS.

he looks better, sounds stronger, looks fatter than ever before.

he doesnt even look like hes aging, let alone dying.

magic johnson played every position in the finals as a rookie including center because kareem got hurt, and the lakers won the championship and now hes beating AIDS.

amazing.

he has a half dozen movie theatres here in LA in the hood.

several starbucks as well.

bought fat burger, the best hamburger chain in LA.

and TGIF!

i wrote a letter to him when i was in college when it was discovered that he got HIV.

im glad they got a tv show together and had jessica simpson sing for him.

im glad they made an ugly statue of him to put infront of staples.

but they should put one in front of the forum too. a better one. a bigger one.

cuz thats where he kicked everybodys ass.

except for that time that mj kicked his ass.

i love you magic.

if i was the mayor, id name the ten the magic johnson freeway.

planet sara + kzug + dc thornton + tina

dear readers of the busblog,

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happy valentines day.

i hope that this day brings you love and happiness and sexiness and smiles. for thats what each of you bring to me every day.

some of you comment. thats nice. some of you write. thats nice. some of you take off your clothes for me and send me the pictures. sometimes thats nice.

some of you have started to write for Lick. that might be the nicest thing of all.

some of you give me money or bid on my auctions or buy my crap. thats unbelieveable.

and then some of you, better still, come over to my house and do some of the most amazing things. thats, well, bizzare. i dont understand any of that one bit. but i love it, and im grateful.

love is all around. and for that im also grateful.

i love living in LA i love living in hollywood i love living near my friends and in the warmth and minutes away from two terribly gorgeous exgirlfriends who continue to love me in ways no one including me can fathom.

i love living in the town that tsar built. punk rock has its own standards of success. no one could refute the sex pistols being successful despite only having one album and one us tour. tsars new record comes out very soon and it’ll be interesting if their label does a better job with hyping that record better than they’re hyping labelmates the polyphonic spree who are also creative and poppy.

i love being able to get away with murder in just about every aspect of my life except my career.

i love the people who i work with and my view of los angeles.

i love that ive been able to make out with the hottest girls in town.

i love that ive been able to pull off this no car thing.

i love the internet and its free porn and music and movies. thank you mr. gore. yes, this does make up for tipper.

i love you dsl i love you direct tv and tivo for you i must thank the Lord above. thank You thank You thank You.

i want to thank the good people of Captain Morgan’s for keeping me stocked up with that spiced shit, i love you all.

i love the wacky kids at Blogger slash Google who made all of this possible. some say the blogging revolution was inevitable and i call bs on that. a Lot of things pre-dated blogging including full blown web sites. but there was something missing in Live Journal and Open Diary and Geocities and aol and message boards and yahoo groups. blogger nailed it, made it easy, were able to handle the periods of success and not implode like whats happening over at friendster. i love what theyve created and im indebted.

i love ebay and paypal and hugh hefner for showing us how its done and i love the ghost of charles bukowski who haunts what is now known as little armenia.

i love herbal remedies, the woman who makes the tom kha kai at palms thai, the old man who tells me dirty jokes in the morning at the xbi gift shop when i get my oj and bagel.

i love howard stern.

i love my true love.

and i love my mom.

happy valentines day america,

tony

raymi + bunny + bunnie + splinkee + tiffany + raspil + mad pony + steph + moxie

If 13 people sit down to dinner together, all will die within the year.

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in korea townThe Turks so disliked the number 13 that it was practically expunged from their vocabulary (Brewer, 1894).

If you have 13 letters in your name, you will have the devil’s luck (Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer, Theodore Bundy and Albert De Salvo all have 13 letters in their names).

There are 13 witches in a coven.

Twelve gods were invited to a banquet at Valhalla. Loki, the Evil One, god of mischief, had been excluded from the guest list but crashed the party anyway, bringing the total number of attendees to 13. True to character, Loki raised hell by inciting Hod, the blind god of winter, to attack Balder the Good, who was a favorite of the gods. Hod took a spear of mistletoe offered by Loki and obediently hurled it at Balder, killing him instantly. All Valhalla grieved. And although one might take the moral of this story to be “Beware of uninvited guests bearing mistletoe,” the Norse themselves apparently concluded that 13 people at a dinner party is just plain bad luck.

the Bible tells us there were exactly 13 present at the Last Supper. One of the “disciples” betrayed Jesus Christ, setting the stage for the Crucifixion.

the Crucifixion took place on a Friday.

friday the thirteenth.

– from about.com

On October 13, 1307, a day so infamous that Friday the 13th would become a synonym for ill fortune, officers of King Philip IV of France carried out mass arrests in a well-coordinated dawn raid that left several thousand Templars ? knights, sergeants, priests, and serving brethren ? in chains, charged with heresy, blasphemy, various obscenities, and homosexual practices. None of these charges was ever proven, even in France ? and the Order was found innocent elsewhere ? but in the seven years following the arrests, hundreds of Templars suffered excruciating tortures intended to force ‘confessions,’ and more than a hundred died under torture or were executed by burning at the stake.

– Tales of the Knights Templar, Warner Books

Someone looked at traffic fatalities in Finland on Friday the 13th as opposed to other Fridays. They found that there were more traffic fatalities on Friday the 13th but only for women. I was asked to comment on this study. Clearly, it could be an anomaly. But my interpretation of the study was that it’s generally understood that women are more superstitious than men. If you add that piece of information to the Finnish results, it could be true that women driving on Friday the 13th were more anxious and may have been involved in more accidents because of their beliefs.

– seattle post

did you know that bunnie is back in america. yep. welcome back, baby.

this week in rock in los angeles

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tonight

berlin, the canyon

lee rocker, cozy’s

kanye west, house of blues

tony bennet, disney concert hall

mort sahl w/ mare winningham, mccabes

saturday 2/14

r. kelly, la entertainment center

deep purple with thin lizzy, wiltern

billy vera and the beaters, cozy’s

kanye west, key club

sunday 2/15

busta w/ lil kim, la entertainment center

snoop dogg’s playas ball, key club

the spazmatics, dragonfly

swell, spaceland

monday 2/16

metal shop, viper room

tuesday 2/17

michael penn, largo

cannibal corpse, key club

melissa etheridge, house of blues

wednesday 2/18

becky, viper room

stephen pearcy, cat club

melissa etheridge, house of blues

thursday 2/19

star fuckers, cat club

nina hagen, key club

supersuckers w/ the hangmen, roxy

melissa etheridge, house of blues

la blogs + joz joz joz + kate sullivan