i ran 6.3 miles last night through the streets of hollywood

took me an hour and a half which isnt bad, but certainly isnt good.

saw so many things that make me happy i run at midnight: saw a fire, saw a bum sleeping with his head up against a palm tree, saw many lines of people in skimpy outfits trying to get into clubs, saw people eating at Pinkberry (had no idea PB was open that late).

saw tourists, saw tourists looking for stuff, saw movies being made, saw food on plates on top of newspaper boxes, saw people buying medical marijuana. in fact that was the funny thing because as i approached the happy couple i swore it was someone i knew, but as i got closer i saw it wasnt someone i knew at all.

i cant imagine living anywhere else in LA other than hollywood which is odd because if youd had asked me 10 years ago what i thought of hollywood id have said “dirty, crime-ridden, trashy, cheesy, ugly” and today id say the same thing, except with a smile.

saw many businesses closed down.

we need some Crazy Magic, president obama.

incase you missed this

Conan’s been dissed by the Peacock. and it looks like this is the best thing that ever happened to him. not only does he have his edge back but hes got 9/12-like empathy from the world.

he also released this statement:

People of Earth:

In the last few days, I’ve been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I’ve been getting paid to do what I love most and, in a world with real problems, I’ve been absurdly lucky. That said, I’ve been suddenly put in a very public predicament and my bosses are demanding an immediate decision.

Six years ago, I signed a contract with NBC to take over The Tonight Show in June of 2009. Like a lot of us, I grew up watching Johnny Carson every night and the chance to one day sit in that chair has meant everything to me. I worked long and hard to get that opportunity, passed up far more lucrative offers, and since 2004 I have spent literally hundreds of hours thinking of ways to extend the franchise long into the future. It was my mistaken belief that, like my predecessor, I would have the benefit of some time and, just as important, some degree of ratings support from the prime-time schedule. Building a lasting audience at 11:30 is impossible without both.

But sadly, we were never given that chance. After only seven months, with my Tonight Show in its infancy, NBC has decided to react to their terrible difficulties in prime-time by making a change in their long-established late night schedule.

Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn’t the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.

So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn’t matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.

There has been speculation about my going to another network but, to set the record straight, I currently have no other offer and honestly have no idea what happens next. My hope is that NBC and I can resolve this quickly so that my staff, crew, and I can do a show we can be proud of, for a company that values our work.

Have a great day and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it’s always been that way.



total class. cant wait for him to get on Fox and beat Jay TO THE PAIN

today is howard stern’s birthday

hes 56. and the king of all media.

i grew up listening to the original shock jock, Steve Dahl, who actually began his show right around the same time Howard created his. in fact their paths crossed in Detroit early in both of their careers. so who really knows who shocked first.

but because i grew up with Steve i was extremely resistant to Stern when i moved out to California. i thought howard was phony, i thought his songs were second-rate compared to Steve’s, and i thought he was riding on the coattails of Dahl who had done the syndication and… everything before Howard.

but as time went on i not only listened to Howard, but id stay up late at night just so i could start recording his show at 3am. id wake up in the middle of the night, flip over the tape, continue recording, and go back to sleep.

since then ive been a super fan. ive been to two book signings (both times i didnt get my book signed because there were way too many people in line), i have been a subscriber to Sirius since he made the move over to sat radio 4 years ago, and i was even lucky enough to work at E! when he had his show there – so i got to see a lot of the unedited video tapes of his tv show. i even bought some stock (at $3, uh thanks)

the thing i like the most about Howard is he’s real. the strippers, porn stars, and freaks are fun, but be it talking about the news, his personal life, or even the weird tragic news about his sidekick Artie’s suicide attempt always begins and ends in a real, frank discussion. pardon me, but thats why talk radio was invented.

howard doesnt back down from any topic. why would he? we are paying $13 a month to hear this guy’s take on Everything. he’ll talk about his small penis, his obsessive compulsion, his too-healthy diet, his fears, his love of The Bachelor and other less-than-manly tv shows.

but i think his biggest strength is that of an interviewer. no matter who he has on the show from Paul McCartney to JFK Jr. to Warren Beatty, Howard has absolutely no problem asking all the questions that the audience wants to hear – starting at the guests’ love lives, wild adventures, and controversial periods. his interviews are do probing that after a while you start judging the guest by how well they open up. the focus moves away from howard almost immediately. exactly what interviewing is all about.

id say that howard is easily the best interviewer on radio, tv, anywhere. he gets right to it, and he gets more out of people than anyone. live on the radio. and now that radio is uncensored so the conversations and interviews are more natural.

critics often get distracted by the adult nature of the show, but theyre prudes and theyre being dishonest. everyone knows that most real conversations can easily include adult details and frank words. but for some reason when they write about howard doing that on the radio they pretend like its “raunchy” instead of real.

theres a reason that morning radio collapsed when howard moved over to Sirius. he was the star and his departure created a black hole that no one was able to fill. howard was #1 from NY to LA. and now he has convinced over 12 million people to pay for radio. not oprah, not anyone could do that.

to say that howard has been an inspiration to me and this blog would be an understatement. to say that this blog aspires to be as funny and frank and real as his show is a given, but unlike howard, i dont have the courage to put everything on the line like he does, which is why i dont have the success and riches that he has.

but theres always tomorrow.

only one out of ever 5,000 people live to 100

how to be one of them

if you want those extra 25 years, which some of us believe are the worst 25 years, start with choosing the right friends. if your friends are fat alcoholics with bad attitudes, guess what you will be?

Life Capacity is 90 years +/- but life expectancy is in the 70s.

so what are we doing wrong?

because TED rules, this dude tells us about places in the world where people live to 100 – and they live with vigor in those years.

so yes, how do we live to 100 and die peacefully in our sleep, after sex? the key is not – is NOT – going to the gym.

have more than 3 really good friends, treat the elderly with great respect, have weekly nature walks, learn how to chill out, and eat small portions of food till you’re only 80% full… for starters.