i think im just gonna dry out.

karisa already beat me to my favorite weekend getaway: vegas. but for some reason shes just going for 1 day, and speaking of drying out, she doesnt drink in any month named January, so how fun can that be?

santa barbara is basically under water, so thats not very sexy.

any good movies worth watching this weekend? omg LEGION!

ok so i guess thats what i will do, eat some raw fish with the truest, avoid the raindrops of this fair city, and then taker to see Legion at an overpriced theatre.

life could be worse.

people could accuse me of writing poems for child molesters, for example.

sigh.

you know the nice thing about trolls. it means youre getting hits.

i havent checked my sitemeter in years. but the best way to judge if youre gaining reach is to read your comments and see if any idiots are out there writing stuff in your box.

it tells you two things: if you are getting traffic, and if you are ruling.

one of those things must be happening.

or maybe just one moron wants me to pay attention.

either way, after it rains, a mariah carey appears.

and believe it or not but “LA Dog rescue” is trending like crazy on Google right now

so heres the vid that everyone wants to see, provided by LAT partner, sister, cousin: KTLA

the dog didnt wanna get saved.

sure as hell didnt wanna get picked up by the fireman dangling from Chopper 1.

now everyones wet, but the dog is safe.

safe to chew up shoes at his masters house

dig holes in the courtyard

and poop wherever he wants.

and thats why God loves mankind.

on tee vee!

and look at that, hes done moved to San Dieger

AND HES BLOGGING! about Popcorn!

omg i never thought id see the day…

that hed wear a vneck sweater and a tie.

while images from Just Jared dance on the screen.

am i in some weirdo hallucinogenic world?

previous projects by Scott included the best name ever for a blog: Matt Welch is an Assclown which was about baseball, naturally.

i writer everyday
and ask her to come back
but i do not send em
i think about younger girls
or bigger girls or wilder
girls arent what im lookin for now
but you know that
and its not super, man, thinking about all of whatever happened
that added up to this
which is me alone at 2am
suckin on a pen
thinking of how i write and write and nothings

you drive through the desert
and you see two things
oilrigs pumping and windmills spinning
motion and no movement
spirit, no action.
whirling and whirling
typing and hoping and praying
and thinking
im gonna die without her
thinking im so stupid to even be thinking

everyone gets over theirs
i got over mines
whats so damn perfect about this little flatchest grrl
with her perfect hair and lips
we’d kiss and cry and lie all night
slept in so many rooms
all over california mexico and foreign lands like
gretna and maui
whats the good lord got saved for me
do bums in the street with heaps of dirty clothes used as sheets
snoozing away in a doorway think about what the lords gonna bring em
and who am i to ask when theyve got real dreams
i just want my little girl.
clouds pass by overhead silent in the nightsky
theyre going to where clouds die
and theyve seen her why dont they tell me hows it really.
the rain, it rains, and it pours on a little pink girls bike
half falling down no kickstand
im damned why wont he say it
in a holding cell not hell but close someone in the cloud has a rope
but theyre scared id use it the cheater way and youd see dangling converses
in the morning with milk but i got better plans dear fans
i just want my little girl.
and they bowl as the rain pours tears from sobbing saints twentyfour hours it flashes
semis blow past spray mud on the corn and i wish sometimes i wasnt born
you dont need me what role am i bukowski kicks the crap outta this guy
dont sex good anymore and i cant hit a curve
i teach fools how to sell im the king of the nerds
so whys he got me breathing still aint i paid all my bills
maybe thats it.
s**t.
i still want my little girl.

had drinks with a very well educated man about this so called innovative band

who said without lcd-s there would have been no lady gaga.

80s throwbacks (because we havent had enough of those) who have two records out and yet somehow deserves the right to be the second bold band on the opening night of coachella.

were those first two albums called “led zeppelin one” and “led zeppelin two”, i asked him.

YES he said YES!

overlooking entirely, we both did, that the third bold band on friday actually INCLUDES a member of led zeppelin, not to mention its drummer being from some seattle band no ones ever heard of.

and those guys have to be listed After lcd freaking soundsystem?

so you got Jay-Z, and supergroup and somehow lcd soundsystem has done something to place it right after Jay-Z

Johnny Rotten wasn’t good enough?

Echo and the Bunnymen?

Grace Jones?

lcd soundsystem.

all we’ve been through together and thats what i gotta see up in lights.

much as i love PiL, i should just stay home friday because of grizzly bear alone, but this lcd soundsystem putsch almost seals the deal.

im too old for three days anyways.

“The photo of LA on today’s front page of the LA Times is awesome..” @TheREALdbean

“the la times front page is unintentionally the greatest thing ever: MA Sen headline with a picture of an evil dark cloud underneath.” – modernoddity

“The LA Times: have a nice juxtaposition of literal storm clouds and political ones — the story about Scott Brown’s victory is above the picture for one about a menacing storm gathering in LA.” – Gawker

hate to break it to everyone, but i dont think that what theyre seeing was intentional. sadly in LA, when it rains, especially as much as it’s rained this week, it’s big news.

crazy, i know. but welcome to LA.

with the busblogger

what do you think she should ask me?

bro, dont choke on your croissant but your hood is under the waters!

scary part? these last two days were just the warm-up acts.

the babes on the tv newscasts are saying that tonight and tomorrow are when the bigass storms are fixin to come to wash us all away like Calgon.

me, im safe in a six story building, until i go home. then im at the will of the 1920s construction folks who built my lovely abode.

needless to say i sleep in my raincoat.

so i started watching it regularily

last night Jon Stewart did exactly what he does best: slap both parties Hard.

this time, though he spanked the Left beautifully for their panic over the 60-seat Senate.

ahem:

“And the reason it will die … [pauses for effect] … Let’s continue … The reason it will die is because if Coakley loses, Democrats will only then have an eighteen-vote majority in the Senate. Which is more than George W. Bush ever had in the Senate, when he did whatever the fuck he wanted to do! [Applause] In fact, the Democrats have a greater majority than the Republicans have had since 1923! But for Democrats, apparently a majority of 100 is … 60.”